Well, "being more sensitive to the guy's need to explain things" can become a problem when you feel (rightly) that you know more than he does!! (especially after spending much time on this very interesting forum!!!)

And when it comes to choosing where you're going and how (fast, slow, types of roads, etc.) you have to voice your preferences... However I've read a few girls here on TE about the strategies they use with their SO: arrange of a meeting point in advance and ride there however you like, ride back at a common pace, have the guy pull the trailer-bike or luggage cart or ride a heavier bike, etc. You'll certainly find a way!

Cheers!