I learned a very important lesson tonight about using google maps to plan routes.

The story is a bunch of my friends and I decided to attend a baseball game tonight. More as a social function than out of any real love for the game. Rather than drive the measly 12 miles downtown, I opted to ride my bike. No gas, no parking and I could get a nice ride in to boot.

I need to add at this point that I grew up in and started cycling in the Portland Metro area. I know the east side of the area quite well and have probably cycled nearly every road at least twice.

But, I don't live on the east side now. I live on the west side. There is an important piece of topography that had never really figured into my thinking before: the West Hills. From downtown to the top of Council Crest (highest point) is about 1000 feet of elevation.

So, I'm on a side of town I don't know really well. So, I spend some time gazing at Google Maps and figure out the shortest route.

About half way over the hills, I realize that 1) I'm fat and out of shape and 2) I don't have the gears to make it the rest of the way up. So, I start taking side roads until I find a way into downtown that doesn't require a belay.

I took a slightly different (and easier) way home. While I'm cooling down from the ride, I decide to have a look at the terrain profile on Google Maps.

Holy-frigging-monkeys. If I had chosen that route for a ruck march in OCS, my instructors would have smacked me upside the head and asked why I was doing that to my patrol.

So. The key piece of info here. If you are using Google maps to find a route and are of dubious climbing ability, take a second to hit "Terrain" and see what you are getting yourself into. Lots of lines close together is bad.

Oh, and we develop that tone of voice early on.