Witnessed an accident today

[crazycanuck]

Berkely, thank you for helping out as much as you could.

Take care of yourself , you're a good person.

[latelatebloomer]

((((bear hug))))

I have so much respect for you that you were able to hold it together and help despite the horror. We all wonder if we'd be capable, and you proved you are made of very strong stuff.

Please do not hesitate to get yourself to a counselor. There is a specific therapy to help those who have dealt w/ a visual trauma as you did, and I hear it helps a lot. Someone here will surely know the name of it, it uses eye movement. And it may help to get this sooner rather than later.

Working in a brain-injury rehab, I think often of those first-on-scene - EMTs, brave citizens, and then, emergency room staff. Those who choose to ride without helmets seem never to think about those who will deal with the aftermath of their choices.

A positive word - although the people in our rehab suffered life-changing injuries, they are, every single one, happy and grateful to be alive. You done good.

((((another hug)))

[OakLeaf]

((((((((Berkeley))))))))

so sorry you had to witness that. THANKS for taking care of him, holding it together as long as you needed to. Now feel what you need to feel, and take as long as you need to do it. (I'm still having posttraumatic nightmares about my stupid biopsy, after two weeks, if that gives you any reference at all.) Let yourself be angry, if there's anger there (there would be if it was me); feel the grief, the fear, whatever you need to do to process that. Journaling is a big help. Take care of yourself.

[andtckrtoo]

Wow! What a thing to have had to experience! I'm so glad you were there, though to help. You kept your head and did the right thing. You are indeed a hero. You should definitelyu be proud of yourself!

I will also echo the recommendation for a trauma counselor. I have done search and rescue and have seen some things that were similar in scope. Our team always had a debriefing and a trauma counselor after each incident. It helped a lot. Such an emotional experience can manifest itself in really weird ways. Seriously. It's not weakness to see a counselor, it's the same as making sure you carry fuel on a long bike ride. It's simply taking care of yourself.

[Serendipity]

Berkeley, what an amazingly generous thing you did for that man. Thank you!

I'm trying to figure out how I can check on him to see if he's OK. I know his first name, and that's it. I'm not even sure what hospital he went to. I'll check the police logs, maybe they'll say where he went and I can track him down.

Can you contact the police department and ask them to find out his condition for you? I was in an accident a number of years ago and the police officer actually called me at home in the evening to let me know the condition of the other people.

[Trek420]

What an amazing thing you did! Thank you! Be easy on yourself, it will take a bit to decompress.

As you were a witness to the entire crash you may find out about his condition. But know he might have been worse off had you not been there.

I saw a motorcycle rider flip right in front of my car. As I saw him take a lane change, then think better of it and go back I thought "this is not good, he's muscling the bike, steering with his arms instead of his body", I slowed behind him and put my flashers on and sure 'nuff .... he flipped out like a rag doll, bike and rider flipping end over end 3 times and landing by the side of the freeway.

This was a new or newer motorcycle rider and luckily for him he had allllllll the gear; full face helmet, jacket, pants, gloves, boots .... and luckier still the three people who stopped included an ER RN, a fire dept. captain who had enough in his truck to stock an ambulance including these amazing scissors which cute right through the bikers jacket

I'm in awe at first responders, the RN and fire captain had never met and they just swung into gear as if they'd worked together for years. I just stood there and took notes as they expertly pieced together medical information and made calls as they ordered it.

I called the fire dept. later on, this lucky rider only had a broken wrist.

If you ride a motorcycle even a little one, take the class that's offered and wear all the gear. I've been told this rider did neither.

[rij73]

Wow, that is amazing. I'm really impressed at what you did. Hope the guy makes it. What a bizarre accident!

DH and I were in CT this weekend. We always see lots of helmetless motorcyclists speeding down the highways. Every time I see one, I just shake my head and wonder about all the people who would be devastated if they were killed or wound up with a massive brain injury. Where is the logic?

[Trek420]

No brain, no pain I also like the fashion statement of full face helmet but wearing shorts, flip flops and a tank top.

If I ever got on a motorcycle again I'd want not just leather but the whole cow with built in inflatable air bags.

Because we ride and one thinks "woah, ____ mph on that downhill, glad I missed that grate or pothole or..." you have that empathy of what can happen to bodies + cement at high speed.

Because they ride, motocycle riders often have empathy to us.

I think motorcycle dealerships should offer a choice of packages with the bike "do you want to get the helmet, gear, and classes included or do you want the discount on long term care? "

[berkeley]

Thanks for all the support. You guys are the best.

I didn't sleep very well last night. I guess that's to be expected. We actually have access through a counselor through work that I can use. I'll give it a few days and see where I'm at. If the stupid thing would stop playing in my head, that would be a good first start. Once was enough!

I called the police and they said he will be fine. I'd guess that he's going to be slightly disfigured as he lost a good part of his forehead (sorry), but given the alternative, I'd say that's great news. Oddly enough, finding that out didn't really give me much relief. I don't know why, I was sure that hearing he was OK would help.

Thanks again.

[teigyr]

You did a wonderful thing and he will always be thankful that you were there to help him out.

Ages ago during my misspent youth, I was on the back of a motorcycle wearing a sundress, sandals, and no helmet. We were on the freeway going 65 mph and traffic stopped. The bike hit the car in front and I flew off. All I remember is sitting cross-legged on the freeway trying to figure out where all the stuff in my purse had gone. I also remember asking the paramedics if I'd be paralyzed because my back was hit and I had a skull fracture in two places. Didn't realize the skull thing at the time, THAT was found at the hospital.

The accident was very surreal until I saw the police report. It was amazing how many people were looking out for me including the woman who stopped her car in such a position that blocked me so I couldn't be run over if someone wasn't looking. The accident itself was such a small portion of what could have happened and I have a strong belief that I survived because I'm stubborn AND there were people around who cared even though they didn't know me. I don't remember any of them...and that might be the case with your guy.

After I got the police report, I sent thank you cards to everyone that was listed. I never heard back and I never really expected to but I wanted to let them know I was ok and that I greatly appreciated what they had done.

I hope your guy continues to do better. And please take care of yourself, it can't be easy seeing what you saw and going through that stress.

[LBTC]

Thank you for checking in, B! I'm glad to hear that the biker is going to be okay. You had a big part in that!

And now you can focus your attention on you! It's so good that you have access to free counselling. Maybe over the next day or so, write your thoughts down - the images, your worries, any of your thoughts. I think it will help you now, and, if you decide to see the counsellor, it will help you discuss what you've gone through since the event.

Personally, I still like the idea of taking that image that won't stop, slowing it down, studying it carefully, visualizing it surrounded by light, then watching a whole group of butterflies picking it up and carrying it away. I think it might help you to both see it clearer, and to let it go.

And now I'm picturing you surrounded by butterflies of blue for calm and white to let the light in and let everything else go.

Big hugs, too
~T~