Need some moral support

[horsemom]

Hi Ladies. I am sitting here in tears from a series of posts on a Mt biking forum, some of which are direct attacks against me because I ride horses. The worst of them have been deleted, but the bottom line is that because of a series of internet attacks by one very disturbed man, I am afraid to ride alone on trails that I love, and helped build.

The first page of the thread where he starts on me can be found here. http://www.wnymba.org/viewtopic.php?...r=asc&start=30 It started with my answering a question (after not posting on the forum for many months because of attacks by "skidder") about a raccoon that was acting strangely, and it escalated.

I know I shouldn't pay any attention, but it is clear that this guy really hates me (he has never met me, btw) and the crime is that I can't ride up there alone with a measure of comfort. I really like riding during the week on my days off, but I won't any more.

Am I nuts, and why does this hurt so bad?
Laura

[mimitabby]

good grief, there are creeps everywhere. A lot of us LOVE horses, you're safe here.
report him to the administrator!
and the admin can give you personal info (if he's actually threatening you!); you shouldn't have to be afraid to ride your horse!
stalking is against the law

[Natural Beauty]

Laura, That is horrible. Report him and when you have his info. call the police. They may not be able to do anything but at least you will be on file. Is there someone you can ride with?
Maybe you could post a fib. Something about your brother coming home from special teams ops. and you are so excited to ride together again. My own brother came home from the war nutier than a fruitcake but I wouldn't want to meet him in a lit alley.
There are things you can do....good luck!

[horsemom]

Thanks girls. It is my mt bike I ride up there - that is the stupid part, I have never ridden a horse anywhere near those trails (though they are not strictly bike trails and on state land).

The admin comes on the thread several times and simply says that he deleted the worst of the attacks and that the man is really mild mannered.

I started as a really gungho member of this group -- going to fests, swaps, and trail work days, but really feel as if they would rather have this cokehead disturbed guy than a good volunteering member.
L

[horsemom]

Actually I see where all the personal attacks have been deleted....so I guess you can't get the real gist of the problem from the thread.

At any rate, the joy of riding my bike on the best trails around has diminished....

Oh well, guess I'll get over it....

Thank you for being such a good group!

[Irulan]

Well, I've been attacked on line in some serious ways, one of which was someone impersonating me and posting really offensive porn on usenet....It felt, really, really awful, a huge personal violation....

I'm glad your moderators are doing their job. My POV is just to take a deep breath and mutter "it's just the internet, it's just the internet"... Some people feel compelled to act like total dicks because they think no one will know who they are. Looks like you've got plenty of local support, too.

Don't let this guy "win" by letting him run you off your trails, your forum, or have you thinking he's out to get you. When people come after me online ( and they have) I just tell myself they are really small people, miserable, unhappy and they have their small, miserable lives to live. Most people who post attacks online do so to get a reaction, so don't give him what he wants. Chances are this guy would never have the balls to act in public like he does online.

Mountain biking needs committed volunteers, so don't let it get you down, sounds like you've got a lot of friends in the community.

I hope as a horse owner who specifically states that she doesn't use the trail in question, you can let the horse comments slide. It goes without saying that horse bike conflict is a pretty hot topic, but, having read the thread it seems like there were two different things going on.

[Zen]

wanna borrow my dog?

[Irulan]

addendum:

I was cruising your board, and they are pretty clear about expected behaviour, and what they can/cannot control.
They linked to this, which is a very good article.

How To Keep Jerks From Taking Over Your Forum

[Mr. Bloom]

Don't let this guy "win" by letting him run you off your trails, your forum, or have you thinking he's out to get you.

+1


But, if you feel any discomfort, carry mace or something (like Zen's dog) for peace of mind.

[beccaB]

A few teenagers I know really use My space alot. One in particular got some very inflammatory attacks. You never know who is posting. It makes me nervous for these kids because it's hard to not take it personal, and there are some dangerous people out there.

[horsemom]

The worse part is, this guy lives and rides in this town. If it were someone far away, I could take it better. I saw him at a race, once, but he did not know who I was. If I were to meet him on the trail, my name is on my bike, I couldn't even pretend I was someone else!

I hate this drama--I just want to ride my bike....

[TxDoc]

Horsemom,
unfortunately Mimitabby is right, there are creeps everywhere.
Stalkers using public forums are not unheard of, and like any stalker they can be very dangerous until proven otherwise. The positive side is that there is professional help available for victims of stalkers (and for those who have reason to think they may become victims of a stalker), and support as well - so you are not alone.
My suggestion is to take stalking very seriously from the start (cyber-stalking included), and to begin familiarizing yourself with basic case management recommendations, and with resources and laws available in your State. I think the NCVC still keeps an updated archive of State laws, so you may want to take a look there, and maybe find out if any of the PD's in your area has a unit that specializes in stalking, or cyber crimes, or something similar.
If the subject keeps showing up on your forum and the inappropriate posts keep coming, I would even get a consultation about your case from a threat assessment firm. Most stalking cases escalate because they are not professionally managed; the victims underestimate the problem and try a 'do it yourself' approach without due knowledge. Of course they try to do their best to solve the problem - but if you are not a professional of threat assessment it is very easy to make things worse unintentionally.
Try to do some research on stalking management, get some good advice from the pro - and be careful.
A couple of last little words of advice:
1. identifiers on vehicles are often a no-no... even more so if you think you may have an unwanted pursuer - so I would remove your name from the bike, as well as things like personalized license plates, etc. It may be good advertisement - but it is never worth the risk.
2. it is nice of your forum's administrators to delete every inappropriate post (make the forum more enjoyable for the users), BUT remember that those inappropriate posts are EVIDENCE. So if you can, keep track of all of them before they are deleted. Most anti-stalking laws require proof of inappropriate communications, and in some States you need to prove that you had reason to worry about your safety (sometimes proving fear as a state of mind is enough, but not everywhere). In other places, proving that your pursuer had access to your whereabouts (for example he knows the trails where you ride and has been spotted there looking for you) is enough evidence for a restraining order or a warrant. It all depends on the case and on the evidence you have, so keep everything!
All communications have to be collected and stored and considered as pieces of evidence. We all hope that you will never need them, but it always better to collect evidence that you'll never need - than to need it and find out that you don't have it.
Take care and stay safe!

[Boise Birder]

Additionally, sounds like you live in NY. We have our issues out west, bikers and horseman have skirmish, but the wise ones say know we must stick together and defend our right to the trails.

Come out west! We have great bike and horse trails, and we know how to share.