grief takes a physical toll

[redrhodie]

Thank you all so much for the warm replies, hugs, butterflies, and to makbike for the beautiful poem. They are ours for such a short time. I was really lucky to have him for so long. He was an absolute monster, and I loved every minute we had together, and treated every day like it was our last. For that, I'm really thankful.

I will give in to the sad. My other kitty is also having a health issue, so that's also exhausting to deal with this week, so I have the right to feel bad. She's 16, her problem is treatable, and other than this one thing, she's in great shape. Still, she lost her best friend, and I'm sure she feels as bad as dbf and I do.

Once she's better, I'm going to start looking for a new kitty to adopt. We would love to get a kitten, but the vet says we should get an older cat. If anyone has brought a kitten into an older cat's home, I'd like to hear about how it went. I'd love to go through the kitten torture period again (I'm a glutton for punishment) but if it really will be that bad for Trixie, I won't do it. She comes first.

[LBTC]

RR - I agree that a new feline in your home will be helpful to you and to Trixie. At her age, I also agree that a full grown, or at least an older kitten (like 4 months old or so) is a better idea. I think it depends entirely on Trixie's charactern whether she'd like a boisterous and untrained full on kitten as a playmate or not. Any chance she can meet some kitties and choose for herself? We used to let Ted do that. He wasn't good with young kittens - we had to bring several back - but did fine with one that we guessed was 4 months old. They ended up being pretty good buddies, actually.

It's tough to be thinking of a new critter to love so soon after a loss, but we've been there before, prompted by the depression of a surviving fur kid, and I wouldn't change it for anything.

Trust in the butterflies and the universe. Trixie will pull through - you can be sad this week together - and you'll both start feeling better soon. And just the right buddy for her will be at exactly the right place at exactly the right time.

Hugs and lots of butterflies,
~T~

[bmccasland]

RR - first BIG HUGS for the loss of your fur baby. Many TE fur babies will be at the Rainbow Bridge to meet him.

I adopted a young cat last winter, she wasn't quite a year old, a few months after my ailing older cat Erin died. New kitty, Calypso, pretty much leaves one of my cats alone, and focuses all her attention on my other cat. Interestingly, the cat she leaves alone was best buds with Erin. I guess Herald isn't ready to love another cat again. Meanwhile my other cat, Bonnie, is not entirely happy with the new attention from an energetic bundle of fur that outweighs her. Although after 6 months, they can be next to each other peacefully. I haven't caught Bonnie or Herald in the act of grooming Calypso yet. Bonnie does come to groom Herald on occasion - I think Herald is still in mourning.

So, short answer - current fur kids will work out whether or not they accept a new kid in the house. Just make sure you give your older kitties lots of love and attention. It might be easier adopting an adult cat, especially if that cat has been in a home with other cats.

[redrhodie]

Thanks, Beth. I think she'd react similarly to your cats--standoffish at best. I'm now leaning away from getting a new kitty right away. I'm getting the sense she's not lonely for another cat. She has been extra affectionate to me, so that's been the good thing this week. A new personality to deal with may be too much for her just yet. We'll see how she's doing in a month or so.

As for me....I went for a ride last night, and it felt really good. I'm taking today off to recover some more.