Dear Ticks in Massachusetts (did I spell it right?),
Please leave my dog alone. She has never had a tick on here the 6.5 yrs she has been on this planet. The Advantix stuff should work. Why don't you just cut it out.

Dear Company I am Consulting for,

If you want to give me an offer, stop telling me that you made half of what I made in NV/CA. Enough already. If you want the good stuff, you gotta pay for it. I run circles around your engineers. Fire two of them, make me a manager. It's all good.

Dear whoever at the old company that decided you should move it to Mexico,

Two words: You. Suck. At least I have the memories.