Ok, I finally have a happier update to report.
After finding out Tuesday that the funding to stay here would fall short, a lot of people started telling me "Go to North Dakota". That same day though, I learned the North Dakota job had been offered to someone else. (That was the last update.)

I had a long talk with my old PhD advisor yesterday. We talked about the possibility of taking a huge pay cut ($750/mth) which would allow me to stay here and how my family wouldn't have to move to a little crappy house in the bad school attendance area, we could take out more student loans. (The kind that accrue high interest the whole time you're in school.)

He pointed out that taking the pay cut doesn't mean I'll keep the pay cut. There are a lot of grants pending for a lot of people, and a number of other ways to make up the lost income.

Most important, he said I absolutely made the right decision to stay here until my husband finishes his degree. He's happy and successful in the college he is at, he had such a rough time at his first college attempt that it is even more important to keep this attempt a success.

I also called the Komen foundation that my postdoc fellowship is from, and they said I can take a pay cut if I want to, they don't care.

I guess not a lot has changed, but I feel like we've come to a final decision that I can live happily with. There are still a lot of things that can go wrong, but my stomach has stopped churning and I slept through 3:00 a.m. last night.