Oh, I do understand Blue...
Very frustrating... and as the others say, boys are boys, and girls are girls, and as a rule they have the potential to always be stronger than us just because of our respective physiologies.

So... what I do is I set my sights on someone who is similar ability to me and try to beat/stay ahead of them over certain courses. We may not be riding at the same time, so beating them may be "asynchronous".

And i measure myself against them, and try to ignore those who fly by me...