Dear former dog owners,
Once again I have the opportunity to transport yet another beautiful, sad, and confused family pet to a new home. I don't know your circumstances of the divorce, but ditching a dog at the local pound as a quick solution to your inconvenience is a no go in my book. There are other solutions that provide a better outcome for your dog. Fortunately, the shelter you dropped her off is very rescue friendly and they work diligently to get dogs into new homes.
Pets become very bonded with their families and divorce disrupts their lives and affects their emotional well being. If you don't believe me, walk back to the cages of a shelter and look into the eyes of a dislocated dog. I have seen dogs completely give up and die, even as shelter workers provided exercise, food, and affection.
My wish is that the new family will give ten fold to this beautiful dog that is a victim of divorce.
Signed,
one whose work is never done
Dear ex-husband,
Thank you for sharing amicable joint custody of our four dogs for 12 years after our divorce.
Speed comes from what you put behind you. - Judi Ketteler
Dear Internal Revenue Service:
Enclosed you will find my 2007 tax return showing that I owe $3,407.00 in taxes.
Please note the attached article from the USA Today newspaper; dated 12 November, wherein you will see the Pentagon (Department of Defense) is paying $171.50 per hammer and NASA has paid $600.00 per toilet seat.
I am enclosing four (4) toilet seats (valued @ $2,400) and six (6) hammers (valued @ $1,029), which I secured at Home Depot, bringing my total remittance to $3,429.00.
Please apply the overpayment of $22.00 to the " Presidential Election Fund," as noted on my return. You can do this inexpensively by sending them one (1) 1.5" Phillips Head screw (see aforementioned article from USA Today newspaper detailing how H.U.D. pays $22.00 each for 1.5" Phillips Head Screws).
One screw is enclosed for your convenience.
It has been a pleasure to pay my tax bill this year, and I look forward to paying it again next year.
Sincerely,
A Satisfied Taxpayer
Dear TE,
Thank for all of the positive energy, friendship and great advice you have given. This is a great place.