Helping a disabled sibling, how far would you help?

[shootingstar]

Are you sure your friend is really communicating her situation to her sibs? Do her sibs understand that she would not get better if "she only tried harder?"

How much would I help my sib? A lot, but I don't know that he'd ever ask me...

It is possible she's given up communicating her current situation with certain sibs. Ater all, she found out from her son and daughter, when she nearly died, some of sibs were talking about what possessions they could take after death. That truly angered her. I have this feeling some sibs have gotten used to her disability..and haven't clued in that she's actually worsened.

And true, sometimes we literally forget about some/our siblings, particularily when distances are far. And forget to tell family of some key health problems yet we'll tell our friends.

Every family is different and I can only speak of my own. Why I feel that amongst my own siblings there would be some help, is that none of us have lied, cheated on each other and if we borrow money from one another it's paid back without debate. And the latter (loan of money) rarely happens. But myself and siblings came to know this only when some of us did fall temporarily in a major ways in the past... and how help in the family was provided. It's a long learning process in any family. Family dynamics is such in our family, is if one visits and stays overnight for several days...you bring a small gift or food or a card. We don't take a sibling's hospitality for granted. And it is proabably stemming from my parents and how they are with their siblings.

I do seriously consider my siblings...good friends....for life.

Agree that help is useful until it gets to a point the giver is an enabler in a person's own problems/procrastination in living with some degree/whole independence.