Yen, you've got lots of great info here, and I have a couple of thoughts, too (as usual )

I just got the Canondale Synapse. I LOVE it! Had it fit by the guy I trust at a nearby bike shop. Went for the first ride last weekend and nothing hurt!! My story is not quite the same as yours: I had a year and a half of not being able to ride due to illness, but started to regain health in November ish. Since January have been exercising on the bike on the trainer about 4 times a week, and doing a ball class and belly dancing class- those last two have really helped with core strength and body awareness. I've continued to do yoga throughout. I bought the Syanpse because of it is designed more for distance / comfort than for racing, and, at the time we fit it, my illness was still causing too much discomfort in my belly to bend over any further than I was. My thought on this frame is that, if you're going to move to a full on road bike, this one ought to become comfortable at some point.

So, why are you putting more weight on your hands? The girls have covered fit quite nicely, and I agree with all of the points they made. Another thought is - how comfortable is your saddle? If your getting too much pressure on your soft tissue, you may be pushing your butt to the back and, thus, stretching yourself out further, which puts more weight on your hands. Another thought is your body position. In addition to seat placement front/back, think about how you hold yourself on the bike. I think I've got this right: your pelvis should be in a neutral position - not tipped forward or back, but, essentially, level. Unlike all those other exercises we do for flexibility, etc, on the bike we want to bend at the waist, not at the hips. This allows us to keep that neutral position, which keeps our sit bones bearing our body weight, while still bending forward to reach the bars. This is where developing core strength helps: it is easier to keep your pelvis upright with your waist bent, if your core muscles can hold it there. It took me years of riding to figure this one out, by the way!! Another cue that might help with positioning, not unlike shrugging your shoulders, try to think of your collarbones broad and open. This may shift your center of gravity a bit back and may lift a bit of the weight off your hands.

As for the fitter at the bike shop - he's sounding a bit elitist. The important part of bike fit is the FIT to that particular rider, not how it looks. If you have difficulty with him still, ask the shop if there is anyone else who can fit you. It's never fun to have to fight for what you need!!

Listen to your body carefully, you know it best, and only you will be able to tell if this fit will be something you can become accustomed to so that it becomes comfortable, or if the bike style just isn't right for you.

I'll send butterflies to help you out with that!

Hugs,
~T~