Intensives

[Wahine]

Thank you so much for that Starfish. It is very helpful.

[Grog]

That sounds a bit like a trainer I had many years ago:

"OK everyone just 10 more push ups..." (or sit ups, reps of anything)

and then, when you're done the 10:

"Let's do five more!!"

Sometimes I'd just crash on my face at that stage.

But you're not that kind of girl. You'll just gracefully bounce back.

You're awesome. Keep going!

[Wahine]

Thanks Grog.

So I've been emailing my Coach all weekend. It's sort of like going through the stages of grieving. First there was the denial email - "I can't/won't do that." Then the bargaining email - "Maybe I can do 35 or 40 miles if..." then the acceptence email. In this email I apologized for being whiney and reassured him that the blood of stubborn Scotts runs in my veins and that I would put the effort in, that the only way I was not going to make this happen would be if I truly physically failed trying, not because I had mentally failed.

And here was his answer:

What I appreciate is your willingness. ***** was just saying how hard it is for her to train with other people because they're unwilling to do what it takes to be better. This is working for you in ways that you can't even imagine.

"To know the self is to forget the self. To forget the self is to be enlightened by the ten thousand things." ....or ten thousand miles, whichever comes first!

So there it is. One more day of rest and here I go again.

[kelownagirl]

That post made me smile.

[Wahine]

Alright. I slogged through a total of 12 miles today. 3 separate runs. Before work 6, at lunch 3.5 and at the track after work 2.5. I'm tired and ready for bed. I can't believe I have another week of this. Well 5 days if I can help it.

I ran into my coach at a restaurant tonight. He laughed and said something about me being a former shadow of myself. My clothes are getting a little baggy.

Well off to bed with me.

[Veronica]

Worry wort sticking up her head - is being a shadow of your former self healthy?

V.

[Wahine]

Thank you worry wort. I've only lost about 3 pounds over the last month, he was exaggerating. But I really do appreciate your concern. It looks like more because I'm on the cusp between 2 clothing sizes usually, so I always buy the more comfortable, large size. My clothes are hanging off me a bit now. I think it was his way of trying to encourage me, he knows I want to lose a bit of weight and he also knows I'm struggling right now.

[Veronica]

Okay, that's good. You know how some runners and cyclists end up looking emaciated? That's not a good look and would ruin my mental image of you.

V.

[Wahine]

Nope, definitely not emaciated. Thanks to my love of beer. Mmmmmmmm beeeeeeer.

So day 2 of this intensive week is done, 12.5 miles today done as 3 separate runs. I had a little help from Aleve. I am getting pretty uncomfortable now. The end may be near. Time for a virtual conference with The Coach.

[Wahine]

I went out for a run this AM. The plan 2 x 4 miles in a loop so I could A) run with a client for 4 miles and finish where we started and B) bail if my legs were too sore. So I ended up bailing and came back to an email from my coach putting me on active rest, no running for 4 days.

So. I had set my mind to getting this high mileage week done. This is the first time I can remember that I have not finished doing something I set my mind to. It's not sitting well with me. Even though I know it's the right decision, I know that my structure is starting to suffer and I know that it wasn't for lack of will. But I still feel like crying.

I guess this is part of the turning you inside out until you come out the other side a whole different person.

Well, good news is that I get to swim more!!!

Off to spend some quality time with my foam roller and The Stick.

[Veronica]

So. I had set my mind to getting this high mileage week done. This is the first time I can remember that I have not finished doing something I set my mind to. It's not sitting well with me. Even though I know it's the right decision, I know that my structure is starting to suffer and I know that it wasn't for lack of will. But I still feel like crying.

I guess this is part of the turning you inside out until you come out the other side a whole different person.

Maybe that's why it's called an Intensive. because you get so intent on accomplishing your goal. I am just so dang impressed with your tenacity. Okay stubborness. Every body has its limit and that's okay.

Enjoy the rest. You really have earned it and learned a lot about what you can push yourself to do.

V.

[Starfish]

But I still feel like crying.

This seems like a completely normal response after the stress you have just put your body and mind through. Especially since you fought starting this new intensive week and had to go through so much mentally in order to get your mind set to do it. It seems to me like that would make it doubly hard to interrupt it now.

As you mentioned, maybe a huge part of the training here is the mental/emotional flexibility about training.

This last year, I started using a phrase about my own life: emotional elasticity. I use it to describe my capacity to accept change, and to experience both ends of the joy/grief spectrum. I know last year, I felt that my emotional elasticity was really at the breaking point. But, it didn't break. And, I think I am a little different now than I was last year, or the year before.

It sounds like you are definitely on that journey to becoming a new self in some way, like you mentioned. Here's to your courage for the journey! (Hoisting a virtual beer for you...but the real thing will have to wait until later.)

[Grog]

Oh, Wahine...

A couple of weeks ago I think you would not have thought that, when your coach would tell you to stop running, you'd feel like crying!

This is really about the mental. And, wow! you're though!!

[rocknrollgirl]

Yoda,
Don't be disappointed. The purpose of this experiment was to find the edge, to push your limits without getting hurt. And you did that. You stripped away all the barriers and went right up to the edge of the abyss.

So from one sicence chick to another, that is a successful outcome. AND you inspired and motivated a lot of the TE runners along the way.

The science teacher says...A+ on that experiment ! Well done!

Now go have a beer.

[Veronica]

Heck, she inspired me and I loathe running! Every morning, I'm hoping to see a Wahine update in this thread.

V.