Dear So and So

[Velobambina]

To Whom It May Concern --- Thank you for decent riding conditions this am. Just a touch of black ice, which I could easily see and avoid. Thank you, too, for keeping the snow away.

[lph]

Dear biking co-workers, with whom I am trying to design a team jersey, in particular the following two groups:

Dear Manly Men: stop being so damn snooty. I know democracy isn't particularly time-efficient, but it still happens to be pretty popular. Don't send me subtle, condescending hints that it's a girlish waste of time. It's an insult to my trying to be fair, and if you don't like the way I'm doing it, do it yourself fercryinoutloud.

Dear Shrinking Violets: grow up. I know we all have strong opinions, but have the guts to just state them in public. Don't let on that you have lots of opinions, then go all precious and refuse to say anything, and don't state your opinions clearly, concisely and politely in writing one day and then go around REGRETTING it the day after.

Just get over yourselves for heavens sake. It's a JERSEY, not the United Nations, a cure for cancer or a divorce. But the coordinator position is up for grabs, as of now.

[lph]

Good Lord. Dear Manly Men and Shrinking Violets. Thank you. You obviously got my subliminal messages yesterday (was it the bulging vein in my forehead? the rapidly dilating pupils? the abrupt grey in my hair?) and decided to behave like normal decent adults today. Peace is restored, all's well with the world.

But somebody else still gets to be jersey coordinator from now on. Now you can see how you like it

[Tuckervill]

Dear biking co-workers, with whom I am trying to design a team jersey, in particular the following two groups:

Dear Manly Men: stop being so damn snooty. I know democracy isn't particularly time-efficient, but it still happens to be pretty popular. Don't send me subtle, condescending hints that it's a girlish waste of time. It's an insult to my trying to be fair, and if you don't like the way I'm doing it, do it yourself fercryinoutloud.

Dear Shrinking Violets: grow up. I know we all have strong opinions, but have the guts to just state them in public. Don't let on that you have lots of opinions, then go all precious and refuse to say anything, and don't state your opinions clearly, concisely and politely in writing one day and then go around REGRETTING it the day after.

Just get over yourselves for heavens sake. It's a JERSEY, not the United Nations, a cure for cancer or a divorce. But the coordinator position is up for grabs, as of now.

This is cracking me up. How ACCURATE! At least in my case I deal mostly with men in my volunteer position--they don't tend to fret about expressing their opinions. They just don't express them--so they can complain about my decision later.

Karen

[lph]

Thanks. I was kinda pleased with the way that came out too

I should have noted, but forgot to - that ALL the biking coworkers I was addressing above are male, both the manly and shrinking kind. Stupid me bought into the idea that coordinating them was going to be a straightforward and simple affair.

[Pax]

Dear disturbed college students,

Please stop thinking the best way to eliminate your demons is to go out "in a blaze of glory", taking other innocents with you. Stop for one moment and think outside yourself and your issues. I realize as a society we've given you the false impression that you are the most important thing in the world, as a thinking human being it was your job to see beyond that and seek help if you needed it.

To the most recent one...Now you are gone and have left tragedy in your wake, if there is a hell I'm sure you're there, if reincarnation exists your next life as a blind beggar in the gutters of Darfur will be waiting.

[Fredwina]

Dear Mayor of Sandy Place Ranch:
While I appreciate getting a birthday card from you, The thought that you know my birthday is a little unsettling, particularly since I have never met you (granted I did vote for you)
and yes, I did appreciate the fact that it was printed and mailed without taxpayer expense, but I'm still wondering who designed the card?

[mimitabby]

Dear Fredwina,
Happy Birthday! The mayor let me know it was your birthday! Not too many people are THAT important!

Mimi