Dear So and So

[indysteel]

Dear Riding Buddies: When I send an email out to see if anybody wants to ride, I would appreciate the courtesy of a response. I know that it's sometimes hard to commit, but then just say that you're just not sure. After all, I respond promptly to your emails asking me to ride, even if I'm unsure of my plans. As the newbie among you--and typically the only woman--I appreciate being included in the group, but come on. Don't be rude.

Thanks.

[three]

Dear Stretch-marks,

You are unsightly and unattractive. I would understand your existence if I were pregnant or in some other state of motherhood. Nay, I am not. Therefore, I respectfully request you disavow from creating a road-map on my skin. Where all these white lines are going to connect and direct someone to, I don't know. But, unless Rand McNally Maps wants to start paying me as a human orienteering map - I kindly ask for the immediate creation of road blocks and an end to any more stretch marks.

***

Dear Boobs,

In an effort to keep my chin up these days (figuratively, of course) - I would appreciate it if we could make this a communal event and have you join in (literally). Up ladies, UP!!!

***

Dear Gov. Pawlenty:

I hear rumor that you are the top Republican for getting the VP pick on the ballot. This scares the crap out of me because I know you will spin your countless f*$! ups in office into gloriously beautiful, planned successes. You have cut funding for every budget that assists social services, elderly, children's health care/foster care/adoption, health care (unless it was for the pharm companies or HMO's), and law enforcement. You fought hard to infringe upon the rights tribes have to their own casino earnings...as if the plundering of their land and genocide of their people by your ancestors wasn't enough. You cut the ENTIRE budget for WIC, the only program that enables a large amount of pregnant low-income women to get pre-natal care and healthy food. Even your right-ring croonies thought this was too much and joined in protesting. Thankfully, you un-did that boo-boo within a couple of days....but it still said loads about your character and priorities. You've done all this and more. The nation won't hear about these things if you get the nod for the vice presidential pick. So, I'm writing you here to tell you that I'm watching and I'll do what I can to get the truth out. Shame on you.

***

Dear Little Boy on the Plane 3 years ago:

It was a long flight to South America and during the flight, day went to night. Your mom was in the seat in front of me and you were standing on her lap and playing with the window blind. Your toddler curiosity was audible and darling - your mom doing her best to answer every question and allow your hands to test everything they desired to touch (I enjoyed that impromptu game of peek-a-boo). You flipped the window blind up and down, up and down. It was pitch black out there - nothing other than the blinking of the wing lights, when you asked - in all sincerity - "mommy, could you please make the sun come up".

I've never forgotten that moment and the beauty of it. The faith of a small child and how powerful they see their mother - so much so that the idea she could beckon the sun and begin a new day just with her very will. It was one of the most graceful moments I've witnessed. Thank you little boy...and thank you to the mom. If you weren't such an incredible woman, I doubt he would have carried such unquestioning belief in your magical capabilities.

***

[mimitabby]

Dear Spinsweb

take that letter you wrote to the politician and send 1 copy of it to your local paper and the other to HIM.

Your letter MIGHT do some good.

Thank you
Consummate letter writer Mimitabby

[IFjane]

Dear Former Employers of Soon-to-be-DH,

Happy New Year to you, too. Could you have been a little more open with your communication regarding the elimination of Michael's position in your company? Would it have been ok to give him a little warning instead of meeting him as he arrived at the office this morning? Could you have shown just a teensy bit of appreciation that he brought you almost $1million in revenue in 2007? That he regularly worked 12 hour days and missed his weekday rides all year? Thanks for nothing.

Guess we'll have to scale down the wedding plans, huh?

Karma......please hurry!

[OakLeaf]

Dear business owners who put the "ICHTHYS" logo in your advertising:

Doesn't Jesus have better things to do than celebrity endorsements?

[doc]

Dear business owners who put the "ICHTHYS" logo in your advertising:

Doesn't Jesus have better things to do than celebrity endorsements?

Um... what does ICTHYS mean?

[HillSlugger]

Um... what does ICTHYS mean?

It's the greek/latin word for fish. I guess it's come to mean the Christian fish symbol.