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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Vernon, British Columbia
    Posts
    2,226
    You know, I still haven't figured out why we all try so hard to not cry in public. When we lost our Yogi dog - he was our first big loss, and it was a very difficult situation - I went back to work and, if I needed to cry, I just did. I'd just be sitting at my desk working and become overwhelmed by the sadness for a moment. The tears would come, and slide down my cheeks, like little bits of sadness, regret, fear, emptiness falling out of me. Very quickly, there would be fewer tears, they wouldn't be as hard, they didn't happen as often. Everyone at work knew what had happened, so I never had to explain it to anyone, thankfully.

    Like everything else, it gets easier with time.

    Hugs and butterflies,
    ~T~
    The butterflies are within you.

    My photos: http://www.flickr.com/photos/picsiechick/

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  2. #2
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Atwater/Merced, CA (Central Valley)
    Posts
    888
    Hugs, Veronica. I so feel where you are right now.

    The others are right, of course - it will get better. We each have our own way to deal with loss, so I say just go with each moment of grief as it comes and don't fret about it. It's ok to be sad. Someone further up the thread said to make yourself get up, start your workout, and give yourself 10 minutes. I like this advice. Myself, I find the best times to deal with my emotions is when I'm focused during exercise. In fact, I crave exercise more when I'm going through something trying.

    Petwise, what helped me through the passing of my beloved dog Roxy from cancer three years ago is to just imagine her there with me. It was a comfort to think that her spirit may be there, if only in my imagination. Yea, I cried often and at strange moments, especially when I would pass the pet cemetary next to the freeway where I had her cremated. I'm sure other motorists thought I was loony.

    Roxy's death left me petless for the first time since I was an infant and with an immense gap in the family unit. So, I knew we would eventually get another pet, but I did not feel ready for about 5 solid months. After that, I started visiting the local shelter in search of the particular breed we had picked out. Being around those dogs helped too.

    In time, about 6 months to the day after Roxy's exit, we welcomed home Mayah. She filled that gap and then some! Interestingly, Mayah was about 6 months old when she joined us. So, I figure Mayah was born around the same time Roxy died. Just the thought of that brings me comfort too -- because Mayah is as old as Roxy's death, it's almost like Mayah was literally sent from doggie heaven. She's three now, and just had a birthday.

    Take care, V. I'll be thinking of ya.
    ~BikeMomma (Kim)
    "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." --Albert Einstein

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Blessed to be all over the place!
    Posts
    3,433
    V,

    I can't add anything except to let you know that the Silver's know how you feel - particularly this time of year.

    Hang in there and know that you're not alone...
    If you don't grow where you're planted, you'll never BLOOM - Will Rogers

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Location
    San Francisco Bay Area
    Posts
    9,324
    It's been a good week so far. I did some yoga Tuesday and Wednesday mornings and I got out for a short ride after work today. It feels good to be moving toward my goals again.

    Thom had a job interview today that went well. He's got two other jobs "pending". They are taking FREAKIN'FOREVER to decide. Well I know we are fine for a few more months, I still felt quite relieved when he called to say that he thought this one might result in an offer. Of course so may the other two... but they can't seem to get off the pot!

    He started putting in baseboards today. Oh my, someday my house is going to be so pretty! The new baseboards are a really nice white and look so good against the maple flooring. Right now... our office is strewn all over the place. I'm not sure where we will put our Christmas tree.

    V.
    Discipline is remembering what you want.


    TandemHearts.com

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Colorado
    Posts
    1,627
    Hang in there V, things will get better. You have been going through a lot of changes, some big and some not so big, and they all add up. Remember to take time for yourself and do what you enjoy doing because I will help to clear your mind and renew your body. Take care and good luck to Thom.

 

 

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