Silver--I've found Gore jackets to fit larger. The smalls are very roomy. I ended up getting an extra small that fits well and has a little room for layering beneath. Gore jerseys, on the other hand, seem to fit "true to size." By that I mean a small is a small.

I like the sleeves a tidge longer in the winter so I can overlap them w/my gloves and/or glove liners.

Have you tried the T-thermal hoodies (Terry)? I found the sleeves go a little longer than usual and on top of a base layer, they are great at keeping you toasty. Also, some of the LLBean base layers have longer sleeves--look for the ones that have the little thumb notch so you can cover your hands w/the sleeve. I think several of the running gear manufacturers are making tops w/that feature, so the sleeves are naturally longer. The Terry cashmore jerseys also have longer sleeves, and are toasty warm for days when the temps in the mid thirties and below.

Take heart, I think most of us have problems w/sizing and our bodies. Perfect is boring.