I am the queen of hair drama. I have curly hair that gets dry really easily.

Definitely use conditioner. I did a frantic call-out a while ago and learned a lot. What I do now is spray leave-in before I leave the house and then have some leave-in conditioner that I put in before my swim cap. I heard to wet my hair too and that makes sense. Your hair will only absorb if it's dry, I think. My hairstylist has noticed no damage or anything like that.

I went through what you're going through less than 6 mos ago. I didn't even know how to put on a swim cap! I'm still struggling but am learning. And unlearning bad habits. At least you don't have those