I don't have a picture because I hate having my picture taken. Gir likes having his picture taken so I used his.

I don't use my real name because I don't want to. Might be hearing from Bruno about my name sounding like an Irish fish and chips Pub or something.

If I google my name, I get two or three hits that relate to me, all of which relates to some research I did in college and a paper I co-wrote (both are painfully boring).

As far as stealing my identity, the US Government has done more to ensure that happens than anything I can possibly manage. At some point, government carelessness has enabled the theft of records containing my entire military record up to 2006 and my employment info while I was a federal employee. If someone got their hands on that, they could re-create me better than I could.