Dealing with a hard decision

[sandra]

This has been comforting to hear all of the different thoughts. Thank you so much. I'm glad to be a part of TE!

[rij73]

I hope I didn't sound too harsh. Of course you should do what you think is right, and it really isn't easy...

Personally, I still think the vet is wrong to put you in this position. Do they do this to everyone who decides to have their dog put to sleep? It's such an agonizing decision to make, that once you make it, it should be final. The vet shouldn't put you on an emotional roller coaster. It's basically like their saying that you don't know what's best so they are taking the dog away from you...

Again, big HUG... I can't imagine what you are going through.

[sandra]

Bull had a stone the size of a bb and never would have passed it. The vet said that the surgery went well and he was doing OK. The vet said he was going to take him home with him tonight.

Hubby told the vet it was the hardest thing he had ever had to do to which the vet vet replied "I couldn't put him down"....

I'm glad he is doing good and in good hands.

[rij73]

This will be my last post here because I don't want my point of view to make it harder on you... Seems the decision has been made. I'll just say in closing that if the vet just couldn't put him down, then he should have offered to do the surgery for free and give him back to you. Otherwise he should have done what you, the kind and thoughtful owners of the dog, had decided. I believe he is very wrong and unprofessional to take Bull home with him.

[Blueberry]

Sandra-

I'm so glad he made it through!! I think the vet is just taking him home for the night, right??? Any more news on where he goes after that??

Hugs to you!!

CA

[BleeckerSt_Girl]

Sandra,
You and your husband need to be strong now and be happy that Bull is doing well.
This was a complex situation where one could look at it from various viewpoints and each viewpoint has it's own "right" and "wrong" angles. It's easy to see it in a negative way, but will that actually make the situation better for either you or your dog? Every viewpoint is valid.

I think the important thing is to be happy that your dog is going to be getting the best of medical care from now on and will certainly continue to be a well loved doggie as well. You did right by him.

[sandra]

yes, he is taking him home for the night because he had a serious surgery and he wants to make sure he is cared for and OK tonight.

[onimity]

Sandra,

I feel so badly for you but am happy that Bull got his surgery and is doing well.

I had a friend that was driving one evening and saw a kitten that had been hit by a car. He was still alive but badly injured so she took him to an emergency clinic. They contacted the owner (on his collar) and she was unable to pay for the surgery to save his life; she was heartbroken, but said the kitten would have to be put down.

My friend was willing to adopt him and pay for his care. Because of the situation the Dr. donated his time, but my friend still had to pay for the costs: anesthesia, operating room, xrays, iv, medication, months of follow up visits, etc. etc. etc. I would assume that the person adopting Bull is going to pay for his surgery and follow-up medical care, or someone is...surgery is expensive even without the cost of the surgeon. My cousin worked for a vet and brought home a couple of animals in similar situations, the vet agreed not to make a profit on the services but she paid for the procedures/medicine/care/food/etc.

I find it hard to criticize the Dr. here, personally. In an ideal world he could volunteer his services and provide free care for all animals, but that's not a sustainable business. I think that the next best thing is to help the animal out and put him with someone that can take on his medical costs. It takes a very loving person to take in a sick animal and I am sure that he'll be well-loved. But Sandra, it takes a special person to do the right thing for an animal you love too, especially when it is so painful. I am thinking of you and wishing you weren't going through this.

Anne

[Triskeliongirl]

This will be my last post here because I don't want my point of view to make it harder on you... Seems the decision has been made. I'll just say in closing that if the vet just couldn't put him down, then he should have offered to do the surgery for free and give him back to you. Otherwise he should have done what you, the kind and thoughtful owners of the dog, had decided. I believe he is very wrong and unprofessional to take Bull home with him.

I really have to respectfully disagree with you. Even if he did do this surgery for free, what about the next one? He found someone willing to adopt this dog, despite all his medical issues, AFTER Sandra and her family agreed they could not do anymore. That is the kindest thing he could have done. And, why should he have done the surgery for free? Do you work for free?

[trickytiger]

This will be my last post here because I don't want my point of view to make it harder on you... Seems the decision has been made. I'll just say in closing that if the vet just couldn't put him down, then he should have offered to do the surgery for free and give him back to you. Otherwise he should have done what you, the kind and thoughtful owners of the dog, had decided. I believe he is very wrong and unprofessional to take Bull home with him.

I apologize in advance.

Are you serious? You would rather that the dog DIE than be taken care of? Who are any of you to demand that the vet offer free services? And where in any of this was it stated that the clinic workers got anything for free? It seems like many of you have just assumed that and ran with it.

I realize this is a tough choice, as a pet owner myself, and as someone who is getting rather creative with money in order to achieve some goals. However. When faced with the option of ending your pet's life versus letting someone pay for and care for your beloved dog, I think the second option is infinitely better. In both cases, you no longer have your dog. The difference? In the second case, your dog has another shot at life. And, it sounds like the clinic workers are caring people who would probably let Sandra see Bull. Please don't heap abuse on the vet- he or she is doing their job. And, vets have to eat too- and pay student loans back!

[sandra]

It is all my fault! I'm the one that in my very emotional state accidentally said "free" in my post with regards to his healthcare. I really didn't have any way of knowing this and that was a wrong assumption on my part and wrong use of words, but AGAIN, I was upset.

I never wanted this thread to turn into a disagreement among members. I appreciate the different thoughts and respect that everyone has their own opinion. It's hard to know what I would have done until I was faced with it. But please, it's going to all be OK.

[Blueberry]

Many vets can and do offer reduced/free services in certain cases (and especially to their employees).

The ABA model rules of professional responsibility says that I have an ethical obligation to provide 50 hours of pro bono work to folks who can't pay for my services (I'm an attorney). Lots of licensed professions have similar obligations. So yes, professionals do sometimes perform free work for folks who can't afford it - some because it's the right thing, some because a governing board says they should. Yep - I have student loans to pay back. Yep - I have bills to pay. Yep - I have to eat.

As Sandra said, we don't know what the situation with the vet tech was - I was just concerned about the vet putting a long time client in a tough ethical situation when he had the power to stop it. I don't deal with life and death situations much, but I've written off thousands of dollars in fees to keep folks from being in a bad situation. And yes, I sleep well at night (if not in quite as nice a house). Sorry to those I offended by suggesting that the vet consider what I've regularly done.

[Tri Girl]

Oh, Sandra. What a roller coaster ride you've been on.
I'm glad that Bull is coming home with you. I'm sure he's glad, too. You made the right decision. Be at peace with that. There'll always be unexpected expenses in life, but you did what you had to do. Don't feel guilty about the mixte either- you should be able to buy the things you want. That's what we work so very hard for every day. To be able to enjoy life.

I'm glad Bull will be staying with you!!! Pet him from all of us when you see him again!