Words that hurt....

[LBTC]

Hi, ladies

I'm wondering if any of you have had a similar experience with a friend and what you did about it?

A few weeks ago the discussion came up about next year's riding season. Having lost my entire season and part of the previous one, to illness, I said I didn't know if I'd be racing next year or not.
"I'd like to think I've learned something from all of this".

My riding friend asked "you mean, like, don't get out of shape?"



I couldn't even come up with an answer, it didn't feel nice at all. Does she really think that I became ill because I wasn't exercising enough? Or worse, that I wasn't even ill at all and have just gotten out of shape from laziness? ouch.

I'm trying to decide if I should talk with her about this or not. I'm probably being over-sensitive again. And I'm sure she really didn't mean to be hurtful.

Have you had a similar experience? What did you do? What do you think I should do?

Hugs and butterflies!
~T~

[mimitabby]

she might have meant it well, and was just not thinking about all your reasons for not riding. Is she by nature a sensitive person?
if not, what did you expect?
If you value the friendship, let it go. She didn't think before she spoke and prob. forgot all about it.

If you can't get past it; address the subject with her.
good luck.

[blueskies]

I say give it to your butterflies to hold for today. Just let them take it, and tuck it into a tree somewhere. Because today is

Your Birthday!!!!


Not the day for thinking about a careless remark that someone else made a few weeks ago.

Today is for YOU! Your birthday! Your celebration! Your JOY!

If you want to think about it tomorrow, you can ask the butterflies to bring it back.

[BleeckerSt_Girl]

I really don't think she meant anything mean by it. She probably just didn't think about how you would interpret it. We all say dumb things that we should have worded better sometimes. I say just give her the benefit of the doubt and move forward.

[Irulan]

why not just say what you feel?

"ouch, that didn't feel very good".

[Zen]

I don't even know what that means.

and that's what i would tell her.

[velogirl]

definitely talk to her. don't wait too long -- you'll dwell on it and she'll forget it. if she's a friend, she couldn't have wanted to hurt you and I'm sure in speaking with her that will become clear. we've all said something at some point that hurts another (without intending to). I'm sure that must be the situation here.