Oh man! What do you say?

[Veronica]

I have a couple of boys calling some of my girls wh0res. Yesterday we had a big long discussion about inappropriate language. They have also been telling them to f#ck a pole. One of my little cherubs asked, "Mrs. Dyson what is a wh0re?"

I replied, "Well a wh0re is a word for an adult woman who does inappropriate things. Therefore it can't be used to describe anyone in our class other than me, because I'm the only adult woman. Since I don't do inappropriate things, I'm not one either. So stop using it, because you're misusing the word."

Their faces were priceless. Seriously, some of them really did have their jaws drop.

I suspect my boys using it are hearing it at home applied to their mothers or older brothers' girlfriends. It's a sad world out there for a lot of kids.

V.

[maillotpois]

That's so sad. Don't they realize they're still supposed to be in their little bubbles of innocence in 5th grade? (And clearly some of them are.)

I'm just waiting for the stuff like that to begin in middle school. A couple of weeks ago, during Em's soccer game there was this group of 8th grade boys hanging out at the end of the field watching and sort of heckling the girls, who did a supreme job of ignoring them. We decided when those boys were adults, they would be exactly the same. But drunk.

[mimitabby]

MP, yes. exactly!

My sons learned an awful lot in Kindergarten and first grade...

Veronica, you did exactly the right thing.

[IFjane]

Excellent job, Veronica. Sadly, our program has a couple moms whose income is undeclared but it is suspected that their profession is exactly that....

[PinkPilot]

Wow, what a great answer, Veronica! It's easy to see why some people work with children and others work with automated systems! In the IT world, a wh0re is more likely to just be a system that is a resource hog!

I think you handled it perfectly.

[northstar]

Great response. It's nice when the right thing pops into the head at the right moment. I teach 7th grade and this sort of thing happens a lot. Like when a kid says he played "Smear the Queer" at the football game and a look of horror spreads across my face and I get to address why that's a bad name for a game. (I grew up calling that game "Cream the Carrier." My DH knew the other name. I must have had more evolved parents.)

[singletrackmind]

Agree, good call Veronica.

They hear it EVERYWHERE. Live, music, screen, 'puter. Whatever happened to shielding children from this stuff I don't know, heck, what ever happened to shielding me from this stuff??
I can't listen to morning radio unless it's npr for the language, the amount of violence and language on the tv keeps me away, even the cds I listen to have to be carefully chosen for content. Words/behavior is at restaurants, the zoo, the grocery store, wherever. Ugh!

(And I've never heard of a smearing anything game, I couldn't even say that, not then if I'd known about it, not now. It just isn't right. I don't know, maybe I'm too old.)

[Mr. Bloom]

35 years later, I still remember my 8th grade teacher sitting all the boys in our class down and giving us the lecture on appropriate manners in the treatment of young women. We were her first year of teaching...but was compelled by our behavior. While she felt visibly awkward, at least one of us remembers it 35 years later.

20 years ago I was a Junior Achievement volunteer in a nearly inner city school in Nashville. The teacher lowered my expectations considerably in preparation for my class. That was the most engaging group of kids, they kept me on my toes! I thought how sad that the teacher lowered his own expectations and didn't challenge them

Then, I did it in an affluent private school...what a drag These were kids of seeming privilege who thought their lives were entitlements and they didn't have to try.

V: congrats for observing their behavior and challenging them to higher levels of behavior!

[Tri Girl]

Nice response, Veronica! It's hard sometimes to think so quickly on your feet. Sometimes my sweet 5th graders do things and my face must just have some look of terror upon it. Like today when I discovered the Playboy in the desk of a boy. He was trying to be sneaky, but while he thought he was being discreet- he was sending me major signals. Sheer horror on my face. I guess that's something that I hadn't thought of addressing: keep your (or your dad's) pornography at home. Maybe that'll be mentioned at our Monday morning assembly.
But you're right- sad what some kids are exposed to and what their parents chose to ignore. I'm always so glad when I come across parents that are right on top of things.