Realty check - body image

[mary9761]

I hate my body, have for a long time and the longer I'm off the bike, the more I hate it and the more I want to eat (vicious circle) I have NEVER had a bra that fit and the ones I have right now are ill fitting 50DDD that are near impossible to find. I don't have 50-155 to spend on a single bra, but even when I buy a bra it may fit ok once or twice then the support starts to break down under the weight of my sagging behemoths. Even having lost weight they are a pain in the (fill in the blank). Since I've lost weight, they are saggier than ever. This is one of the first places I gain weight and last I lose, but the weight I lost has only made my body image worse in this case. They are nearly to my waist and I figure by the time I finish (if I finish) losing my weight they will literally be to my knees empty skin sacks with a lump in the bottom. I lay on my back, they fall into my armpits, I get too far onto my back and they smother me. I bend over too far they smother me. My husband loves me the way I am, but too bad I don't either way it's hard to feel sexy with all the loose skin as I lose weight and it's hard to feel sexy weighing over 300 pounds (thankfully not back there yet, but approaching it again.)
Sorry I know TMI..

[teigyr]

... it's hard to feel sexy with all the loose skin as I lose weight and it's hard to feel sexy weighing over 300 pounds (thankfully not back there yet, but approaching it again.)
Sorry I know TMI..

no, not TMI at all. Do what is healthy for you and what makes you feel good. When all's said and done, then get someone to fix the excess skin.

There is so much we don't have control of and when you find that place where you're happy and want to stay, ask for help to make it better. The cycling is such a good step to all of that.

I never believed in plastic surgery at all. Starting from way back when til about 10 years ago, I've had multiple surgeries on my abdomen. No matter what I do, I've lost muscle tone and it sags. DH, who is adverse to "beautification" as I am, even said that if I ever wanted, it should be fixed.

The way I see it there is vanity and there is "fixing". Be healthy, be happy, and for those things you can't do, have someone help you.

I know it's a struggle though.

[deedolce]

Ooog. I've been living in sports bras. Went to the VS site, and measured myself. My chest size is 1" smaller than my band size!! If there was a 36AAAA, that would probably be me.

My top, or lack of, is my biggest area of self consciousness, in the buff. Enough to make me stay single, even. Bleh. I look good on a bike, though!

[lph]

Well it's hard to say not having been there, but I think that if I ever gained and then lost a large amount of weight, I'd consider surgery to remove loose skin part of the "fixing" process towards maintaining a healthy, functional body, and not vanity at all.

Deedolce - the flattest-chested girl I ever knew (I swear, her chest was like a boys with 2 pea-sized bumps on it, she looked about 11) is also outgoing, funny, outdoorsy and is now married and has three children. You'd be surprised how many guys really don't care much about boobs.

And I hate the assumption that I'd rather be "bigger" than A/AA too. I wear unpadded bras, and dammit, that's what I look like!

[Dianyla]

no, not TMI at all. Do what is healthy for you and what makes you feel good. When all's said and done, then get someone to fix the excess skin.

Seconding this. A good friend of mine used to be obese in the 220-230 lbs range. She has completely changed her lifestyle and is an extremely fit person, teaching yoga, and being active. She's like a size 0-2 now. However, after losing all that weight she had a lot of loose skin. It was like pizza dough, she could pull and stretch it out 6" away from her body, and she actually had to tuck it into her pants. She had a pannus reduction surgery earlier this year and is thrilled with the results.

Just make sure you go with a good surgeon, it is a fairly major procedure.

[Kano]

Yup, there CAN be health issues related to the excess skin flapping around, it's not just an aesthetic thing, so this is a "fix" rather than a vanity issue. I think, if I find myself with flaps, getting it repaired will also be a nice incentive to maintain the loss, though I can imagine I'll want to be sure I've stabilized before doing anything that major!

But body image -- it's quite a thing, isn't it? We were at an "art in the park" show a week or so ago, and there was an artist exhibiting "fat girl art" as my girls named it. Cute stuff, kind of inspirational in that these zaftig females were doing all sorts of fun things, not just sitting around being fat as it's so easy to do (hey, I KNOW this to be true!) One picture had our chunky lady looking into the mirror at herself and seeing a lovely thin, curvy reflection.

I look at it and say to myself, how TRUE! -- I've always been surprised to see myself in a mirror or especially photos, and have a more outside look at myself: That's ME????? Yikes! (Lately, I'm seeing myself in the mirror and saying, That's me? Cool! -- I'm not sure I want that deflated by a photo at this point!)

On the other hand, my oldest daughter, who's battled with her body image over the years too -- looks at that same picture and says it's totally BACKWARDS. She says the thin version should be the one looking into the mirror...

Karen in Boise