Look on the bright side - at least you have a husband to "help"I'm a single mom to a 5 year old. I get short rides in a lunch during the work week where I either do a leisurely ride, intervals or hills. I save the weekends when he's with his dad for my long rides so I don't feel guilty about not spending time with him.
I do have a tag-a-long for him but he really isn't into riding and I'm not pushing it.
Maybe you could have dh watch the kids for you while you take a ride, and maybe sometimes you could do a leisurely ride with the family. Any chance you could ride during lunch? We don't have showers where I work but it's easy to master the art of the sink bathGood luck!