I'm having a bit of a running crisis, and it's making me melancholy.

I've been following a training schedule for a "goal" event in November pretty closely and so far it's been going pretty well (I do better when I am training for something...hence this event). But I'm starting to feel a little out of sorts about it.

I don't think I'll have a problem getting the time/miles in this week, but the next few weeks are making me rethink this whole idea. The schedule I'm using has you do back to back days with a long run and then another one about half the distance of the long run, sometimes more. Today I did 14 and felt pretty bad (I think due to starting too late and having to run in the direct sun a lot of the time, something I've been avoiding most of the summer...and due to a calorie deficit) and tomorrow I do 8. I'm not too worried about that. However, next week is 16/10 (a little scary), week after that is 18/10 (scary), and week after that is 20/10 (really scary). Yikes. I then get an easy week before the big mileage starts (22/10 for two weeks and 24/10 as the BIG ONE). Of course you are also running the rest of the week, with 2 rest days. Running back to back days is one of the standard ultra training techniques as it trains your body to run on tired legs (you always get the following day off completely). And so far I have to give it a thumbs up (at my lower mileages, anyway); I usually feel really good the 2nd day.

But I may bail altogether.

I've been running alone, which means that after about 1.5 hours my head starts to get messy and I feel like I want to quit and go home. DH is not supportive of my effort and in fact thinks that I have a problem (problem: liking endurance activity) and has been a jerk about it, so I have to plan my runs so that they don't interfere with life. And then there are all those other things that I like to do or have planned, like the Tour de Vins with Shiraz the 20/10 week (which I've already signed up for and am really looking forward to) and a mtn biking trip to Moab in October (the first 22/10 week). I think I would still finish the 50k even if I did these things and didn't follow the "schedule", but I'm not sure I have it in me to train properly, schedule or no.

So we'll see. I'm going to try to stick with it, but mentally it's already hard and I'm not even at the big mileage yet. I'd like to do it because I really do love trail running and the 50k is in a beautiful location (Stinson Beach in Cali). Since I train at 6000' elev and up, I will have an advantage running at/near sea level. I can always do the 30k, and I think that might be a nice compromise.

Those people that do 50 and 100 milers are amazing (and most definitely a little off kilter ). I have a whole new appreciation for what they do. They must put in some serious miles the 2 months before an event!

OK, I'll quit whining now. I just wish I felt better about it all.