After thinking about this, I'd also hesitate to give something that had a shelf life. I do agree with a future heirloom....or something that can exist throughout the relationship.

While I'm not mercenary, I do place significance on things. I can have a ribbon that came off something from a place that was special and that ribbon is incredibly valuable to me. So I guess I see giving gifts as an opportunity to have the recipient always see the gift and be reminded of the person that gave it to them.

Now THAT all being said, I know some people are far more practical than I am!

So maybe something for the house? Artwork? A trip (that was said before) and I also agree with donation. Marriage is kind of special so I think the gift should reflect that. We didn't do gifts but we had one heck of a wedding