Am I being overly sensetive.

[mimitabby]

am i missing something? Join the club!
then it's YOUR club. Sensitive? I am too. I take everything like that personally.

if he says "I think it might be more than you can do" (is that what he said? re-read your post, it wasn't clear) if he's ridden with you, maybe he's just concerned that it is an order of magnitude harder than the last ride you completed with the club. But you just did some mighty hills on your own.
Call him back and say i did this hill and that hill recently, I think i can handle a 25 mile ride..

The problem is honestly, if these guys are A LOT better (ie faster) than you,
whoever holds back for you is not getting a workout like he'd like to.

There are some people that don't mind doing that, but most people are too self centered and want to ride their own ride.

I hope this helps.

[jobob]

There are some people that don't mind doing that, but most people are too self centered and want to ride their own ride.

Ouch, Mimi, that seems a little harsh to me. People have lives and responsibilities and might not have lots of time to devote to riding. So yes, I could see them wanting to get the most out of that time.

I used to teach a beginners road skills course which would kill my entire Saturday. We started out with 10 mile rides and by the 4th week we would be up to 25 (I think).

I don't teach that road skills class anymore, because after a while I didn't enjoy blowing a precious weekend day to ride a short distance at a slow pace. If that's being self-centered, so be it.

[mimitabby]

Jobob
i couldn't think of saying it another way. You took the initiative and taught beginners; but most people won't do that!
I've been on a lot of rides, and there are people that will stay in the back for folks like ME, but most won't.

[jobob]

Mimi, you'd probably like riding with my husband, he's super-patient and likes to ride in the back (and he has quite the fan club among the Northern California TE contingent, I'm finding out ). Alas, I'm nowhere near as patient as he.

[mimitabby]

Mimi, you'd probably like riding with my husband, he's super-patient and likes to ride in the back (and he has quite the fan club among the Northern California TE contingent, I'm finding out ). Alas, I'm nowhere near as patient as he.

Jobob, I guess we'll find out, huh! (November)
I am working as hard as I can when I ride to get my speed up. But it's not easy.
at least here where I live there are MANY choices. Poor DDH is stuck in the tooleys with only this one club!

[jobob]

Jobob, I guess we'll find out, huh! (November)

Ooh, are you guys planning on doing the Oregon Randonneurs' Wine Country 100K near Portland on Thanksgiving weekend? I'm really looking forward to that.

[mimitabby]

Ooh, are you guys planning on doing the Oregon Randonneurs' Wine Country 100K near Portland on Thanksgiving weekend? I'm really looking forward to that.

oops, Jobob; we don't do wine. I was thinking you knew Raleighdon from a ride in Arizona!

[DDH]

Let me just say that I am very sensetive to the fact that some may not want to hold back for the slower riders, and I totally understand, and that is the reason I made it very clear that I am slow. I have the stamina to ride longer rides, but I am slow, I ride about 11 mph average on a rides. It is very hilly around here and I work them all the time but cannot seem to get any faster on them and that is what slows me down so much.
I feel like I have gotten stronger on my rides but them hills get me everytime.

I think if they could get more beginer's I could be the one in the club to stay back with them. Then I would feel useful and not like I was holding others back. LOL

[Dianyla]

Another thing you can do is ask this guy to give you the route that the 25 mile ride is going to take. Then, go ride it yourself to gauge yourself on it before signing up to do it with a group.

I think if they could get more beginer's I could be the one in the club to stay back with them. Then I would feel useful and not like I was holding others back. LOL

Maybe you could offer to help the club out and start leading beginners rides yourself?

[Irulan]

Maybe you could offer to help the club out and start leading beginners rides yourself?

There have been a lot of good comments along these lines. I will throw in my two cents to elaborate.
I am president of a really small but busy bike club. People will come up to us and say, "why aren't you doing such and so" or "you should be doing such and so". Well, you know what? In any organization, there may be a lot of members and attendees to events but usually only a few key people that actually get involved and organize/create activities. It's the same old thing, only 5% or less help out wit the organization. Organizer usually have thier hands full with all the things that are planned already. This is why new blood is so important, and getting involved to get what YOU want out of the club is vital to the growth of the organization.

I agree that this is a great opportunity to maybe add a new beginners element to your organization. Hopefully they will support your efforts to set up a super-beginner ride. Don't be discouraged if only a few people show up, either... be proud you are taking care of yourself and being part of the solution.

Irulan

[michelem]

Hi Donna,

I can relate! When I started out, the group I went with had some "EZ Rider" rides, which were basically 20 miles of flattish (gentle, gentle rollers that felt hilly to me as a beginner, but really were not!). Well, that group leader moved out of state and when I asked if I would be welcome on the other rides I was told no, that I was too slow and it wouldn't be fair to the sweep person. I was so disappointed, but glad they were honest. I took it as a challenge to improve on my own and rode the trainer a lot. About a month or so later, I heard of a new group forming and contacted them. They said come on out! The "C Group," which is the beginner's group started at 40 miles along that same "flattish" trail, but I made it! The next week we bumped it up to 50 and the next 60! We stayed at 60 for a couple weeks and then topped out at about 75. I'm always at the back, and part of that is a choice for me as I don't feel comfortable riding too close to other cyclists. Even when I tell them all to go ahead and don't wait up, someone always hangs back a bit to make sure I'm okay. Part of me feels "guilty" about that, as if I might be ruining his/her ride, but then I just have to tell myself that I've given the person an out and if he/she still wants to hang back, well okay!

We're now starting to cut back on the mileage and add in hill climbing. I find that everything evens out in the end - I am stronger at the climbing than some of the heavier-set guys, but they FLY past me on the downhills as I am clutching the brakes!

Anyway, all that to say, I think this may be a combination of things for you:

1. Confidence in your ability - sometimes you just have to take the plunge and find out - you may surprise yourself!

2. Ability to take feedback and believe it (oh, this is a tough one!) - if you say, I really don't want to hold you back, go on ahead, but the person hangs back anyway, well that is his/her choice! No reason to feel badly about it.

3. Maybe look into some skills and drills clinics to help you feel more confident in your group bike handling skills.

4. Challenge yourself to keep increasing fitness on your own.

5. Shop around for other cycling groups and maybe you'll find one that is more your speed.

Anyway, not sure if any of this helps or not. I am super-sensitive myself, so I do understand. I have to say that just getting out there and doing it has increased my confidence level though (even in the non-cycling-related areas of my life), even though I am still quite the beginner.

Good luck to you, and keep us posted!

[Pedal Wench]

I gotta side on the 'being overly sensitive' team.

I'm a member of a large club of very diverse women. Some rides are beginner rides, and some are not. I think you can't expect every ride to cater to everyone, and I would much rather know ahead of time that a ride is out of my league - for now! Some rides are no-drop, and others have occasional regroups, and some have none. As a club, whether new or small, they owe it to the other riders to have some rides that cater to them, and some that cater to you. Perhaps you can start your own slower-paced group that meets with everyone, but rolls out a minute behind at a slower pace. You get the commaraderie in the parking lot, and maybe arrange to meet for eats afterward - the fast group has to wait for a table and order drinks just as you roll in and sit immediately.

[KSH]

I think if they could get more beginer's I could be the one in the club to stay back with them. Then I would feel useful and not like I was holding others back. LOL

Build it and they will come.

Seriously. Tell him you want to start a BEGINNERS ride. Something with few miles and maybe you can find a route with small hills. You be the one to head it up!

You can do it!

[jobob]

But back to the original post.

Ah, now I understand where you're coming from, Donna. It sounds like you're a bit between a rock & a hard place here.

It's really unfortunate that the group is too small at this point to offer a variety of rides. Odds are a group of riding buddies of similar abilities got together and decided to form a club.

Hopefully more beginners will join in over time and someone will be willing to lead some shorter rides. One thing that some of the clubs around here do is have a ride scheduled for a specific day each month (say, the first sunday of the month) where they have a "getting to know you" beginners/social ride, as well as other short rides other times in the month.

One possiblity is to try to get something like that going yourself. Maybe if others see that there is an active beginners group in the club (even if it's a group of one at the moment ) they might be more likely to join in.

[mimitabby]

yeah, don't any of those guys have wives that might ride if it wasn't such a hard pace??