OK, let me try to give an update.

I got my Swim safe, but was sick just prior to my triathlon. So I didn't get any chances to use it.

I didn't feel the need to use it during the triathlon. I figured that there were lots of lifeguards there to help me if I needed it. I seem to be more apprehensive at our practice swims. We have folks who keep an eye on others, but everyone is really there for there own practice. And I hate the thought of interupting others or asking for help.

Well, I went into that Tri with my only goal being not freaking out in the water. My team members who knew about the problem that I was having gave me lots of encouragement and I actually made it through. Very slowly, but no big problems. I realized that I have made it past my usual freak out point (about 5 minutes in) and then I was able to relax even more.

Since that time, I've taken every opportunity to swim in the open water. And somehow, each time I take my Swimsafe, but haven't actually used it. I know that I have it so that if I do feel apprehensive or afraid to get in the water, I can get it out and use it.

At each of the open water swims, I haven't tried to swim for a really long time (less than the others and less than a half mile). But I try to swim past my "freak out" time. And then each time I swim in the same lake I try to swim a few minutes longer.

Another thing that I have done is I bought some wetsuit socks off Team estrogen
http://www.teamestrogen.com/products.asp?pID=20137

I won't plan to use the socks for actual tri's (don't know if they would be legal) but I think that they will help me getting into the lakes we swim in for practice. I just hate the squishy mud and have to force myself in each time.

A few things that I've discovered. I do much better if I have a very definate turn around spot. I don't like not knowing exactly how far I have to go. I have to start very slow and take long breaths with each stroke. It helps me to have a song in my head to give me a beat and distract me, I used the song, "Steady as she goes" by the Raconteurs for the tri.

Finally, I've been reading Total Immersion which is like yoga for swimming. You know, "Be one with the water."

Anyway, I'm still really slow but I'm not freaking out, so I call it progress.

Please tell me how you are doing!!!!!!!