Although this isn't a cycling story, it's gross nevertheless.

Some years ago I used to commute nearly 30 miles into work. One day I was running really late so had the pedal to the metal in the car ( doing about 80 - 90mph). A bird flew into the windscreen and went splat. Now that is bad enough but it had obviously just had it's breakfast of...WORMS. Loads of worms. Big worms, little worms, medium sized worms and the force of the impact spread them all over my windscreen. Of course, that would be the day when the windscreen washer bottle ran out

By the time I got to work, the worms had all dried up onto the windscreen. What a job scraping them off with the ice-scraper. YUKKKKKK!!!