Need Reality Check

[slug]

I am frustrated and really could use some help . . . my bike partner and I went on a ride this weekend. We both have new road bikes - It took us 4 ½ hours to ride 42 miles. (Now, the ride was an easy ride) While on the ride, she kept stopping to eat and at least every ten miles would stop to go to the bathroom. (She indicates that this is a sign she is fully hydrated and indicates because I am not that I need to drink more, even though I am drinking plenty of water) When I attempt to discuss biking with her she reminds me that the male she is dating has ridden 75 century rides (oh, did I share with you that he stops home and takes naps during his ride). I am struggling because I don’t have any other bike partners. Please provide me with a reality check / suggestions as to approach the topic . . . anyone?

Thanks
In the saddle toooooo long

[mimitabby]

Hi slug.
I too often have to go to the toilet A LOT. especially in the beginning of the ride. But I have noticed (and you can tell your friend) that it's better to get right back on the saddle, because lounging around you tend to stiffen up.

do address this with her; she might see reason. But some of us really have to go a lot.

ps, again, if she is bragging, if it's worth it, let her brag. But you don't have enough time in the day to go home and take naps in the middle of the ride! (and I'll bet neither does she!)

[Geonz]

Since you both are new to your bicycles, this may get better, espsecially with a little encouragement. (Bladders are their own issue, though.) It might not I'd go on a couple more rides and sort of make a deal of them going a little faster with less rest stop time ("let's see if we can go a little further before the next stop") in a positive way.
SOme folks really are take-it-easy riders, though.

Now, there are ways to equalize things. Do you still have that old bike? Then you're working harder. Another thing I do is sprint to the rest stop and for another minute beyond, and then back. I've gotten an interval in, my rest is two minutes shorter, and I *want* a rest :-) I just say I'm feeling hyperactive and I'll be there in a minute or two... wear that jacket that acts like a parachute... (the converse of this is that if I'm the weaker in the group I make sure to *coast* inot the rest stop even if everybody else sprints and don't start at the back!)

[Zen]

This woman may be a good partner to ride with occasionally but in the long run I think she may be a deterrent to any improvement of your own abilities.
To rationalize her style by telling you of his accomplishments in an odd defense.

Maybe you should ride with her boyfriend instead

[Batbike]

it is difficult to ride with slower riders -- almost as difficult as riding with riders twice as fast as you! so, if her pace and/or style of riding is difficult to keep, you may need to limit your rides with her. as you ride more alone, keep an eye out for other riders and ask your LBS if they can recommend people or places where you could group-up with more riders ... in time, as your fitness and comfort level increases, so will your circle of riding partners!

personally, I have friends who are slower than me and ones faster -- both ends fun to ride with, but NOT all the time. it is nice to have variety!!!

[DarcyInOregon]

While on the ride, she kept stopping to eat and at least every ten miles would stop to go to the bathroom.

Slug, how do the two of you find a restroom every 10 miles? Is it all urban routes or rural routes?

I ask because me and my biking buddies get together for the longer rides, and the routes are rural with maybe a tiny farm town or two. We have to go through contortions to develop routes for the longer rides that will have at least one restroom stop. Tiny little farm towns don't have restaurants, gas stations or public restrooms. How are you able to find restrooms so easily?

Darcy

[margo49]

Exactly my reaction, Darcy.
Not to mention the dh and his "naps'. Oh to be some people! I used to come home from a 3 or 4 hour ride that I started at 6.30 on Saturday morning so I could get home by 9.30 and get a shower in before I started the Family Breakfast (a big deal fry up, etc). *And* I didn't always get the shower!
[Everyone is older now so it is not like that these dayz, but you know how we mothers get in retrospect when we hear certain stories]

[amymisk]

Here is something to think about for frequent bathroom stops:

Overactive Bladder.

I know from personal experience, that prior to starting treatment, I was always having to stop for the bathroom, at least once an hour if I was properly hydrated.

Now, I know what it is like to not spend the day in the bathroom!

Although, I do wonder, much like Darcy, where do they find all those bathrooms????

[mimitabby]

In the seattle area, you can find bathrooms. as you drive out to the tooleys
there are bathrooms in parks, minimarts, and construction sites.
and there are always bushes too.
So what about Overactive Bladder?

[GLC1968]

If it took you 4.5 hours to ride 42 miles, then every 10 miles was approximately every hour. That's not all that much for food or pee breaks. Of course, if you were traveling at 20 mph and stoped every 10 miles, that would be more 'excessive'. And if each break is 20 minutes, then yeah, that would be really annoying, too.

I think if you do want to stop less and ride more, I would suggest two things. 1) suggest to keep the breaks shorter or 2) suggest that she could eat on the bike if she must stick to such a regimented nutrition routine? As far as the pee breaks...I'm not sure what you can do about that.

[Deanna]

When I attempt to discuss biking with her she reminds me that the male she is dating has ridden 75 century rides (oh, did I share with you that he stops home and takes naps during his ride).

The pee and food stops I could deal with, I'd have to stop this attitude though if I were to continue riding with her. I wish biking talent/skill/knowledge passed automatically between two SO's (My husbands a WAY better rider than me). IMHO, unless you are doing one of the longer brevets where there is a designated rest stop for napping, going home and napping makes it two rides (the one before and the one after the nap).

[twinkie]

I'm a newbie to riding, so I make my BF stop every 10 miles or so (I think I've only really done "easy" rides. I'm terrible at hills/inclines). I don't have the bathroom issue, but I do need to stop for a drink (I haven't quite mastered the skill of grabbing the water bottle while riding) and a Gu. I think the most I've gone without stopping is 13 or 14 miles.

[Starfish]

I know that when I first started on longer rides, it was hard to organize eating on-the-roll, so to speak. But, perhaps you could model eating while on the bike for her? At least then the bathroom breaks would be the only breaks, rather than eating and bathroom breaks?

[Jiffer]

In my opinion she's drinking too much if she's peeing that often. Some people sweat more than others and need to drink more and they aren't necessarily working harder than those who don't sweat as much. Her superstar BF probably needs to drink a lot more because he either works a lot harder and/or his particular body just needs more hydration.

Also, some people just simply need to pee a lot more than others, whether riding a bike or not. I am sadly one of those people! Before my first longish ride with DH on the tandem I said, "And there's potty stops, right?!" However, I have found that the more I drink on a ride, the more I'm certainly going to need to stop to pee. Or hold it! I don't sweat as much as some people, so I think my body makes me eliminate it differently. I think I really just don't need as much to drink.

Speaking of her superstar BF, my superstar DH just did an amazing century coming in 4th out of over 300 with 10,400 feet in elevation. His most impressive ride yet. He planned not to stop even once, but had to when the guy he had teamed up with simply had to stop briefly to refill his bottles. Dh was going for speed and adjusted his eating and drinking to accomodate that. He stuffed a bunch of bananas and nutrition bars in his jersey, and figured out how to stay hydrated without having to stop. It can be done! And he's serious about getting the energy you need from food and liquids.

Everyone has different things that seem to work for them. If she seems to think this is the way things have to be done and won't bend, then she's obviously not a suitable riding partner. But, as others have suggested, you might gently suggest less and shorter breaks and, over time, you guys may come to a middle ground you can both be happy with. She may come to realize she can get by with less potty stops and/or carrying her "fuel" in her jersey to either eat while riding, or something that she can eat wthin a minute or two when you do stop.

[Zen]

Some people simply haven't the skills yet to eat and drink while riding. I do take advantage of intersections to take a swig and if I need to eat it's not much, maybe two fig newtons but I never get off the bike. This can't possibly take any longer than about three minutes.