Wow, wow, wow. I haven't been around in a few days, and I've missed this thread! The first thing I noticed is how civil everyone is being. It's so nice to have a place like TE where people can discuss as adults differing opinions/experiences and ideas!

This thread has been eye-opening for me. It's made me appreciate my husband and our biking relationship all that much more!

I've had relationships with jealous men in my past. My husband has had the same. We didn't meet until we were in our mid-30's, so we'd both 'been around the block' so to speak. We knew that when we met, we'd found something special almost immediately and we really, truly understand and trust each other. Jealously of the opposite sex really doesn't play a role in our relationship because not only are neither of us jealous people, but we both trust each other completely. That said, I know that I'd be jealous if my husband found another woman to ride with not because I'd be afraid that he'd cheat or that a friendship would develop into something else (which I find laughable), but because I want to be the person he rides with. This is because biking is as important to me as it is to him and it's something we've shared for 2 years now.

BUT, if I wasn't interested in biking and he wanted to ride with another woman...I'd be fine with it. I know that I'd be fine with it because he's done this exact thing but with tennis. He met a woman through an online service (about sports) and he wants to meet up with her to play. I don't have time for tennis anymore so I'm totally ok with it. And I know he feels the same when the situation is reversed. I ride at lunch at work all the time and 9 times out of 10, I'm riding with a guy from work. In the past, it was almost always with the same guy because we had a similar pace. Not only was DH fine with it, he's now asking why I never mention this guy anymore. When I told him it's because he's not riding anymore, he says that's too bad. No jealously whatsoever.

I will say that I have a feeling that your husband's 'dislike' of your riding situation is probably multi-faceted. It's not likely just about the guy you are riding with. It sounds like it's probably partly that, partly that you are out doing something that he's not involved with at all, partly that you have found a new passion that he's not party to, partly that you are going to be getting in better shape and going places by bike that he can't go. Had you developed a close riding relationship with your buddy's wife instead of your buddy, I'd guess that your husband would still feel some resentment or jealousy. It may be different, or it may be less, but I'd bet it would still be there.

Unfortuantely, outside of what you are doing (talking), I don't really have any helpful advice. It's always hard when one member of a relationship finds a passion that the other member doesn't share. It requires adjustment and change for both parties and it can be difficult. Keep those lines of communication open and good luck!!