KSH, sorry to hear about your Mom. Both of my parents are couch potatoes, they eat a terrible diet, full of processed fatty foods. They drink, a lot, and they smoked for 30 + years until just a few months ago. My dad finally had to quit because he was diagnosed with chronic obstructive pulmonary disease. He said to me "Well, I should have quit smoking years ago". And I'm thinking "Yeah, like when I asked you to when I was 7 years old and I learned how bad smoking is . . ." Not looking forward to watching my parents die of lung/liver cancer . . . It is really hard to watch those you love make poor life choices.

Anyway, your issue with BF sounds similar to my issue with DH and his eating. He complains that he needs to loose weight, but then he loads up on his favorites, sausage and cheese. I tried gently making suggestions (like maybe not eat so much sausage and cheese), and he got surprisingly and exceedingly defensive. I gave it a few months, then I tried again, even more gently, and he was still very defensive. I got the feeling that he didn't want advice from me, that he felt he should be able to solve the problem on his own. I was just trying to give him another perspective. Finally I've been able to get my points across by applying them to myself, such as "I read that eating more protein in the morning helps to control hunger during the day, so I'm going to try that next week . . ." I've been much more successful using the indirect approach, speaking in generalizations instead of "YOU should do such and such".

You could try saying something like "I'm happy with my bike average, I think those 65 mile rides really helped increase my speed". Maybe he'll take the hint if its not delivered in the form of a lecture. (Not to imply that you were lecturing him, so to speak).

(Meanwhile DH has been training like a nut and is the thinnest he's been since he was in high school. All the exercise makes him more concsious of how he eats and he's doing a great job of limiting his sausage and cheese intake).