Stuck in the middle

[jobob]

Good lord, love, it's just a bike ride !

Sure it would have been nice if you were able to keep up with the new group right off the bat, and it sux when you realize you're not yet as good as you'd like to be, or think you should be, but these things take time.

Stop beating yourself up and go back and ride some more with that faster group. You'll get better by pushing yourself. It sounds like the group leader was encouraging you, whether or not you wanted to hear it at that moment. Soon, maybe not tomorrow or the day after, but soon, you'll be able to keep up with them.

Then when a new person comes along and is in the same boat as you are now, you can 'pay it forward' and encourage him or her.

[Crankin]

Well, I can relate to the feeling of being stuck in the middle. And it's true that to get faster you need to ride with faster people. But, I got faster (up to the point I am now) by riding alone or with my husband. He pushed me and I was able to get faster without all of the "stuff"of group rides.
I find that I am way faster than the "slow" group rides in my club and I lead intermediate level rides where we cruise on the flats at 15-18, but since we ride in hilly areas, the average is often between 13-14. There are always a couple of stronger climbers than me on rides I lead and I let them go ahead and wait for me at the top. But usually it's guys who really ARE much stronger than me. I have found one group that is exactly like me; the rides are social and I climb as well as all of the people who lead these rides. We go 15-17 on flats, and while I often can sustain 20-23 for awhile when I ride with my husband, I don't necessarily want to do this for a whole ride. Another group I ride with starts out really slow in the beginning of the season and builds up by the end. One ride with them, I had an average of 16.4, but it almost killed me. They don't warm up well and that puts me at a disadvantage. I got dropped at the end by a woman wearing sneakers and a t shirt
So, sometimes I am competitive, but mostly if I do that too much, it makes me start to feel like riding is a job. I don't want to ever feel like that. In fact, I often ride with people who are slower than me, to force me to slow down and smell the roses.