Balancing career, parenting, chores, cycling..

[annie]

A number of years ago while trying to work full-time, be the room mom, the scout leader, stuff the classroom folders, and a million other things one of my mentors shared this with me:

The mother who gives up her life for her children does them no kindness but rather burdens them with the legacy of a life unlived. --Janet Falldron

I still struggle with taking time away from my kids (13, 11, and 9) to ride and do other things, but I don't want them to ever think THEY prevented me from following my dreams - what guilt! And as much as they whine about it, they still like it when their friends say, "Your mom rode how many miles? OMG! No way."

Way.

A very wise quote. Who is Janet Falldron? Thanks!

Annie

[mimitabby]

I just did a search on Janet Falldron and found nothing, except the one quote.
I disagree.. Mothering is NOT a life unlived.
Being there for your children teaches them so much. Who do you want them to learn from? you or ... ?
As a mom who worked for all but the first 3 months of each sons' life, I struggled with guilt for leaving them in day care for years. But i picked them up as soon as I could every day; which meant I dragged them to appointments and to the grocery store. I read to them every night, and whenever they had something to tell me and i was distracted I tried to stop and listen; because I knew that soon they would have someone else they'd rather talk to.

As soon as they could, we had them on bikes, I remember when a two mile ride was an all morning event.
My sons today brag to their friends about the fact that at our house we had dinner at home almost every night as a family. a life unlived, indeed.
My sons don't feel guilt for the years that they were small and needed a mom around..
They are proud of me today for what I was and what I have become.

edit: I searched for just Falldron there is only the single reference in all of Google, so it is either a made up or misspelled name. Shortly, there will be a second reference to this name; this thread!

[kelownagirl]

Good points everyone! I agree that I am amazed at the women with little children who have the time (and energy) to exercise. I have two generations of kids - two daughters who are grown and moved out, and one son who is 9. I never found the time to ride or anything when the kids were little but that has changed in the past 2-3 years for me.

Luckily for me, DH and I work together (teachers). In the spring and fall, we ride to school, bring biking clothes, and we ride 20-30 k after school several days a week while my son is at a famiyl daycare, playing with his friends. We do 30-50 k rides on the weekend. I will leave my son home alone for up to an hour now when I ride once in awhile, but that is rare because he is usually at his dad's on the weekends so my time is free then. I'll admit, my house is a mess, my classroom isn't the tidiest, but I am healthy and fit and in good emotional shape. DH and I spend most of our time together and we both like it that way. Those things certainly help to enable me to ride lots.