Would it be possible for you to hire a coach for a while?
If not, read something by Lance or Greg LeMonde for inspiration while you take a break. Everyone knows about Lance's cancer but did you know Greg LeMonde was shot in the chest as a result of a hunting accident? Two years later he won the Tour....by fifty seconds !

I just keep telling myself "you can and you will!"

Re-read your own post. I think you might see your answer right in there...