Wow!

That's a tough one. I've also had a wreck that almost killed me. I do things differently now. Mr. even pushed my envelope for safety sometimes. But I still ride and like to ride fast. But I chose areas where I feel safe doing so.

a few questions that came to mind as I read your vent.....how old are you and what kind of riding do you do now and what kind of bike do you have now?

OK, so I suspect that really the best thing for you was to simply take the time to write out your frustrations. I hope that writing that out helped. Sounds like you need to do a pro and con listing and write out your specific goals in life and your goals for exercise and recreation.

Finally, did you really want to know our opinions? If you didn't don't read on.........don't buy the bike. don't get back into racing.