donation dilemma

[mimitabby]

Some of you know that i did a fundraiser stair climb in March. Most of you don't know i am a genealogist. Through genealogy I have met many people; including one woman who has the same maiden name as my grandmother. She wrote to me once, the typical; oh we're the same name how interesting etc..
and then i never heard from her again.

until about 2 weeks ago. She writes me and tells me her daughter is running the London marathon this weekend. and could i donate, the cause is the national Lifeboat institution, they save lives at sea.
Daughter? I didn't know she had a daughter. I wrote back a friendly note saying, i didn't know you had a daughter, it sounds like a good charity, at least send me a picture and tell me something about your daughter.
She sends back a short email, she can't send pictures, but her daughter runs and the most she has done before is a half marathon and this will be tough.

I send her back a friendly maybe.
well this week, she is looking forward to seeing how much I will donate!
http://www.justgiving.com/larissa_s
What do you guys think?

[East Hill]

Well, it seems a bit cheeky expecting you to donate just because you share the same maiden name of grandmothers, but the charity is a worthy cause, nontheless.

I've given money just because I like the way someone wrote a post in a forum .

I'd suggest donating 5 GBP ($10 USD)...and hope that she doesn't make a habit of it!

East Hill

[mimitabby]

thanks for responding. Cheeky is a perfect word for it.

[Adventure Girl]

Lots of fundraising tips tell you to ask everyone you know to donate. It doesn't hurt to ask. I'm sure that's what this woman is doing. Donate if you feel the charity is worthy. But don't feel obligated.

[Blueberry]

I had replied, and apparently it didn't make it in before the boards went down for maintenance.

I think asking for a donation would have been OK, but presuming that you will donate is not. My usual answer is that I've donated quite a bit to my local charities already, and that I don't have any more in my budget. There are lots of good charities out there, and we all should be able to choose the ones we want to donate to without feeling pressured. I've hesitated to do fundraising rides because i don't like to make people uncomfortable though Not the best result, clearly, for me or the charity.

So...I would say don't donate unless you really want to. You certainly shouldn't feel obligated.

[bouncybouncy]

I am getting prepped to ask all my friends and family (and even a few local shops) to donate to the JDRF Ride (Junior Diabetes)...my first thought in going into this is that everyone has "their" charities. I do not expect anyone to donate! If they do that is great! But how am I supposed to get the donations in the first place if I do not ask?

Don't read into it too much...just politely decline and move on.

***hey...if she gets upset then she won't be bothering you in the future

[mimitabby]

yeah, but these are people you know! good luck. be sure to post about it HERE you might get some donations

[teigyr]

cheeky is a perfect word for it! Probably I am the worst fund-raiser in the world but I hate pressuring people and I get cranky if people pressure me. The way I see it is there are times when I do several fund-raising type things within a year. Periodically I'll mention that I am doing something, especially if it is pertinent to someone in particular, and I get donations that way.

Of course, I'm the person who has been known to provide all her own donations

Except for the AIDS ride, that was something like $3,500.

I am bad. And Mimitabby? You are very nice and patient for not getting cranky with her.

[bouncybouncy]

yeah, but these are people you know! good luck. be sure to post about it HERE you might get some donations

For the most part they are people I know...but I was thinking of persuing outside my circle. You see, my cousin does the JDRF walk each year in Denver which is about the same month so we are discussing how to go about approaching friends and family for 2 functions...or to just ask for a donation once, fulfill the minimum requirement for the ride and put the rest toward her walk team (or split the difference if there is a large amount raised)

Fund raising is a touchy subject in my house becouse my husband sees it as panhandling of sorts...in certain ways I agree (eg: this gal "expecting" a donation from you) I am just hoping to come across in a matter that will not make my victims feel guilty if they choose not to donate to "my" charity of choice. Like I said...we all have "our" charities of choice. But then again I disagree with my husband because I know the charity is doing a good job (80-95% off all procedes goes directly to research) and I DO NOT get piles of flyers on a daily basis! Also, it is close to my heart...my little cousin was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes at the tender age of 18 months and is dependent on insulin for the rest of his life! He is also Celiac...so to say his parents had it easy is silly! If you met him today though you would never in a million years think he had anything special about his daily life...he is a vibrant young 5 year old who will not let this get him down!

sorry...thanks for listening! and YES...thanks for the invite to post...I will and not expect any guilty donation! hehe

[justj]

Simply - I wouldn't do it. You just never know.

[mimitabby]

I didn't. I decided to not give her anything. and welcome to TE!

[onimity]

Good for you Mimi.

I always hate it when people pressure me for money. Not that I am stingy, if someone has a good motivation for riding or an inspiring story I don't really care if I know them, I am happy to donate.

My standard response sounds a lot like yours: 1) give me info about the charity and time to do my research. 2) why is the cause important to you? If I can't get a clear answer to either of those or feel pressured to donate *right now* without reading more, well, I'd rather save that money for another cause. We all have to choose wisely in where we make our charitable contributions, right?

People probably behave that way because they make the situation so awkward for others that a lot of people feel compelled to donate to remove the pressure, but it isn't really a great way to get anything more than a nominal donation. But, yea, *seriously* cheeky!

Good on ya

Anne