Creepiness? Or just friendly?

[quint41]

I didn't read all the posts, but I did see one that I have to agree with .... ladies, if you feel uncomfortable, SAY SOMETHING. As girls, we are raised to not make waves, to not speak up, to be nice all the time. I'm not saying we have to been nasty, but we DO need to learn to speak up. If a guy did not like the way someone was behaving on a ride, you'd bet he'd say something. He wouldn't necessarily be rude about it, but he'd speak up!

I don't like people drafting me. I'm not a strong enough and confident enough rider yet. There are only a couple of people who I will allow to draft me, but they are well aware of my ability, and they are very experienced riders. Others who try to draft me, I simply turn and tell them that drafting makes me nervous, would they please move away, thank you. I've never gotten bad feedback for doing that.

(I used to watch my girls play softball. Never fail, in the outfield, two girls would run for the flyball and at the last minute, they would both stop short and the ball would hit the ground. One dad, who is a psychologist, called it the "you first" method of playing outfield ... "You first. No, really! You were there first, I insist!" Put two boys in the outfield, and one might end up with a concussion, but the ball would definitely be in someone's glove!)

[missymaya]

I agree with the rest of the ladies that this was a definately a creepmaster. I ride the trail everyday to get to and from work and in the early mornings it's not bad but in the afternoons you get some homeless people fishing and some suspicious charaters and a few months ago a woman was attacked and raped there. I make a note of what they look like and where they're at and ride as far on the opposite side as possible. Usually these people are harmless but I don't know if any of them will try to hurt me.
I haven't been in this particular situation but if it were me, I would definately say something and say it forcefully and loud (not yelling loud but loud enough) so that he should get the point to back off. If he still doesn't get the point pull out the cell and make a call and let the creep know that your notifying authorities about him. If DH is with you, use that to your advantage. I'm not saying women are helpless, but there is power in numbers and DH would probably scare the creep off.
Hope this creep backs off and safe riding.

[Geonz]

The "when is drafting okay?" question is a real "it depends" one. When somebody passes you and you catch up and draft a little from a not-too-close distance... many people (myself included) don't mind, though it *is* crossing into personal space.
I think teigyr's story and Kimmyt's stories are good ones to sort of compare and contrast. Kimmyt's guy was tacky... but a fairly common "this guy doesn't know when to rein in his ego" thing. I suffer from the same thing but I've got my mirror, so when you're gaining on me from behind I'm going to speed up *then.* I'm too proud and introverted to draft off ya; if you pass me I may let you get a bit ahead and then put on the speed just so you *know* I'm strong (and try to refrain from actually beating on my breast) ... but Ack! Pass you??? Not likely.
Teigyr's story, though, crosses the "normal" threshold. A: he's different for men and women. B: he "drafts" at slow speeds. Let's face it, they folks who are speeding up for ego reasons generally *want* to blow by me so when I slow down, they will speed up and be proud. This guy is not drafting - I don't want to *know* what he's doing.
I'm not saying eveyrbody should be normal, and he might not have a lot of control over his normalness. However, he needs to know our culture's social rules and learn to abide by them in public places. Could be the authorities have already spoken to him and wish more people would speak up... maybe he's got a caseworker. He may be lonlely, but he's certainly not going ot make friends with his current behavior patterns so it might be doing him a favor to convince him they need to change...