Dear So and So

[ace]

Dear force in the universe that plays a role in determining my health,

OK, I get it. I need to take care of myself. I need to not smoke, eat right, exercise and think about the level of stress I'm subjected to at work. I need to cut myself a break emotionally and not beat myself up about things that go wrong in my life. I GET IT, OK??? Now can you make my knee (and this sudden weird thing with my foot that's freaking me out) better? I am going to Italy in 7 weeks with my oldest friend, and after 10 years with no substantial vacation, all I want is to stroll around Florence and ride a bike down some Tuscan roads without pain. Is that too much to ask? You have more than amply proven your sense of the absurd by letting me be extremely healthy last year while ex-bf was sick and depressed and I was driving him around and feeding him and wiping his emotional butt so he could get well enough to dump me for his ex-gf, and then a week after he dumped me you put that freaking water on the floor for me to slip on and smash my knee. And then I had the fun of spending the holiday season popping pain pills and sitting in the dark in my house because every light bulb blew out in a one day span, and I couldn't stand up long enough to change them. And then there was the funny thing with you killing my refrigerator 2 days before Xmas so I had no ice for my knee until I got a new one (fridge, not knee) after Xmas (the footwork on the last two items may have been accomplished by one of your associates, but I know you had a hand in it!). Ha ha ha! Very amusing.

I am bowing down to you in all your magnificence, ok? Now please just take the pain away until 6/5, so I can train, go, and have fun?

With great respect,
Amy

[crazybikinchic]

Dear Grade Goddess,

I know that I did not do as well on this exam as proven in the past, but PLEASE be nice and at least let me pass the exam!!!!!!

[silver]

Dear Weather Man,

What the H*ll did you do with my Spring?

signed,

shivering silver

[missymaya]

Dear Grade gods and goddesses,
Please let crazybikinchic do well on her exam. I've been there and am there right now with 2 projects, one that I will get back tonight. Please be good to us. I work hard and bust my tail so I can do well and I dont want my hard work to go down the tubes!

[Wahine]

4 flats in the last 3 rides is a little excessive. I know it's important to practice repairing flats, but really, I think I'm pretty good at it now and you can leave me alone for a while. OK?

Thanks.

[IFjane]

Dear force in the universe that plays a role in determining my health,

With great respect,
Amy

Amy - I feel exactly the way you do - though I will have to say your episodes far outdo mine! I just want to get through all this internal stuff that is happening to me and feel GOOD again. It seems someone is conspiring against me. I'm sending positive thoughts your way. You are bound to have some good luck soon - and have a WONDERFUL trip to Italy!

And SS (Shivering Silver) - Not only did the weather man take YOUR spring, he's down here right now running off with ours!! And just when I have a 5 day weekend, too...**POUT**

[crazybikinchic]

Dear Grade gods and goddesses,
Please let crazybikinchic do well on her exam. I've been there and am there right now with 2 projects, one that I will get back tonight. Please be good to us. I work hard and bust my tail so I can do well and I dont want my hard work to go down the tubes!

Pleeeeeease!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[silver]

(Shivering Silver) - Not only did the weather man take YOUR spring, he's down here right now running off with ours!! And just when I have a 5 day weekend, too...**POUT**

The ladies and man of team estrogen must hunt down this scum, this low life, this....this.....stealer of warmth and retrieve our Spring.....our merry warm weather.....and punish him to....to....riding a bike without a seat, to riding in the way of our snot rockets and spit, to ride all of our rides with us and keep his mouth shut, to stay at OUR pace, to do OUR routes........

*Silver mounts her carbon steed and flings her flowing velvet cape around her shoulders and pulling her silver hood (helmet) over her head and heads out eastward on her mission*

[mimitabby]

Dear god of weather
Just because everyone else is complaining about their weather doesn't mean we don't want to keep the nice weather you sent our way yesterday and now today was even better. It is starting to seem like WE could actually have weather that is not wet/cold/rainy/dark.. Is that possible?

Thanks

[oxysback]

Dear god of weather
Just because everyone else is complaining about their weather doesn't mean we don't want to keep the nice weather you sent our way yesterday and now today was even better. It is starting to seem like WE could actually have weather that is not wet/cold/rainy/dark.. Is that possible?

Thanks

+1!!!

[Wahine]

Dear god of weather
Just because everyone else is complaining about their weather doesn't mean we don't want to keep the nice weather you sent our way yesterday and now today was even better. It is starting to seem like WE could actually have weather that is not wet/cold/rainy/dark.. Is that possible?

Thanks

+ another 1.

[dex]

Dear god of weather
Just because everyone else is complaining about their weather doesn't mean we don't want to keep the nice weather you sent our way yesterday and now today was even better. It is starting to seem like WE could actually have weather that is not wet/cold/rainy/dark.. Is that possible?

Thanks

+ another 1.

I'm with them...especially because I should be able to pick up my new bike tomorrow or Friday...

[IFjane]

The ladies and man of team estrogen must hunt down this scum, this low life, this....this.....stealer of warmth and retrieve our Spring.....our merry warm weather.....and punish him to....to....riding a bike without a seat, to riding in the way of our snot rockets and spit, to ride all of our rides with us and keep his mouth shut, to stay at OUR pace, to do OUR routes........

*Silver mounts her carbon steed and flings her flowing velvet cape around her shoulders and pulling her silver hood (helmet) over her head and heads out eastward on her mission*

I'm with you, Silver! We will hunt him down and taunt him until he retreats.....his father was a hamster and his mother smelled of elderberries....oh wait...that's another taunt....his father was a mud puddle and his mother was....help me here!

We have a 50% chance of SNOW tomorrow night - it's APRIL for cryin' out loud!!!! ENOUGH!!!

[Kitsune06]

Dear weather god
I wave my biking shorts at your aunties!
Now go away before I taunt you for a second time!


....
*squeak, squeak, squeak...*
FRENCH GUARDS: [whispering]
C'est un vélo, vélo de bois. Quoi? Un cadeau. What? A present. Oh, un cadeau. Oui, oui. Hurry. What? Let's go. Oh. On y va. Bon magne. Over here...
[squeak squeak squeak squeak squeak...]
[clllank]
ARTHUR:
What happens now?
BEDEVERE:
Well, now, uh, Launcelot, Galahad, and I, uh, wait until nightfall, and then leap out of the bike, taking the French, uh, by surprise. Not only by surprise, but totally unarmed!
ARTHUR:
Who leaps out?
BEDEVERE:
U-- u-- uh, Launcelot, Galahad, and I, uh, leap out of the bike, uh, and uh...
ARTHUR:
Ohh.
BEDEVERE:
Oh. Um, l-- look, i-- i-- if we built this large wooden badger--

[Fredwina]

Dear people who print the Voler catalog,
You must knwo I like thier stuff, but did you have to send me 5 copies of the catalog? I looked, all same name and address. You have heard merging dupilcates, have you not? For a slight additional fee, I can even show how to do this...