How do you explain one of them...

[Offthegrid]

This happens to me, too. My workload has tripled since I was hired and I'm on call more than twice the amount of time they told me I would be when I'm hired. I fortunately don't have to put in more hours typically (sometimes); I just try to work much faster. But my office is FULL of workaholics.

Is it possible for you to bike commute to work? Then at least you'd get a ride -- and you could possibly take a ride at lunch, too.

[KSH]

That's a tough situation.

I think I would approach it by talking to your Boss about what makes you a more productive employee. Being healthy and having a balanced life will keep you from burning out on the job and eventually leaving.

If you are a good employee who your boss values... then he/she would want to you to keep working hard... but not burn out and leave.

You don't have to say... I MUST CYCLE... instead... just say that to stay sane and productive, you need to have some time for physical activity. And you are more than willing to put in the time, but there are some days when you might only work an 8 hour day, and you hope she/he can respect that... so you can keep working hard and not go nuts.

[Mr. Bloom]

just say that to stay sane and productive, you need to have some time for physical activity. And you are more than willing to put in the time, but there are some days when you might only work an 8 hour day, and you hope she/he can respect that... so you can keep working hard and not go nuts.

As a boss, I would honor this...but I encourage you to write out what you would say and practice it before you actually say it. Be sincere in your delivery.

I make sure that people know that I (and they) are better off with balance in life. I honor this and model it for my employees.

Regardless of your political orientation, you have to acknowledge that President Bush is able to have scheduled exercise everyday...and he leads one of the largest countries in the world!

So, if the prez can do it, we can too.

[East Hill]

I don't think you have to say "I need to go ride my bike", so much as "I need some time to do physical activity which will allow me to focus better on the tasks at hand, and I'll need this much time per day to fit in this exercise".

I know what it's like, I've been working six days a week for far too long because the management here do not wish to make the person who has a bid to relieve me actually LEARN the job. He's on 'light duty' because HE's stressed. Apparently I don't count. So, I ride my bike everyday.

East Hill

[Blueberry]

As a boss, I would honor this...but I encourage you to write out what you would say and practice it before you actually say it. Be sincere in your delivery.

I make sure that people know that I (and they) are better off with balance in life. I honor this and model it for my employees.

Mr. Silver-

Sadly, I would say that this puts you in the minority of bosses, based on what I've seen. Of course, I work in a worse than average profession (law) in a very large firm.

Our billable hours requirements actually jumped significantly a couple of months ago, and we haven't been paid any more money. The entire attitude is "how many hours can we squeeze out of each person." Need to take care of a family member? Only if it's a convenient time. You're really sick - you can't take a sick day unless it's convenient (which means almost never). You thought you were leaving early (6) - ha - have this 6 hour project on my desk before your go (nope, not a court or client deadline). I can never predict when I'll be home. There's been half serious discussion about what kind of stimulants (e.g. caffeine) and in what doses most effectively let people get 4 hours of sleep so we can work more. Their entire concept of work-life balance is 1) being passionate about your work so it is your life and 2) telling you how to hire people to do other stuff in your life so that you can work more.

So....kudos to you for what you're doing! I can only wish there were more like you out there.

[Crankin]

In the past few years, I have stopped taking on extra things, like committee work, projects, etc. Now I know teaching is a little different, but once you set the expectation that you are the one that does everything better and "more," it is hard to scale back. Thankfully, I can manage getting up early and I get to work at 6:40, when I really don't need to be there until 7:30. I get most of my work done then (planning, etc) as well as during my regularly scheduled planning period. I think that people know that once the weather turns nicer, I am out of here by 3. I tend to stay later one day a week. I grade papers at home, after my ride or other exercise.
But, I admit to cancelling other types of obligations such as dental appointments because the weather was nice!
But, this is one of the reasons I am resigning/retiring in June. I am ready for some fun. I never thought I would want to stop working at age 53; I have always been a type A workaholic.
By the way, my husband is a boss like Mr. Silver. He sets the tone by prominantly displaying his bike in his office and going on lunch rides, or riding to work. His boss runs at lunch. The whole company works on the premise that happy employees (and fit ones) are productive employees.

[SheFly]

You need to set expectations. From my perspective, your managers are giving you more work/responsibilitiy because you do a good job. If you don't say anything about the additionaly workload, and continue to do a good job, they are going to continue to give you more work/responsibility. It's a viscious cycle.

I decided after my last job that my work/life balance was extremely important to me. The best approach that I ever took was to be upfront with my boss about what I would and wouldn't do. After working together for 5 years, he now knows that Tues is sprint night, Weds is TT night, and Thurs is team training night, and that I don't work past 11:30 am on Friday. The flip of that is that I am also flexible enough that I can be available if something really requires my attention.

So, I was open and honest, continue to get my work done (well), and am flexible enough to meet my manager's requirements. In return, he tells me that I have a terrific work/life balance . Have the conversation - it's really worth it.

SheFly

[Jo-n-NY]

Although I do not work 11 hours a day, my commute to Manhattan makes it an 11 hour day. I leave at 6:12 by 5:12. When daylight savings time begins I am out on my bike right when I get home. I have food prepared that I can quickly heated up and I am out the door usually for no more than an hour, but my motto is something is better than nothing and it keeps me happy. I use to live just 10-15 minutes from my house until they moved the company so this was a major adjustment for me.

I agree with the others, that if you need to leave earlier a few days a week or whatever it takes to keep you mentally happy, do not tell your employer exactly what it is for. What is important to you, is usually not important to the other person.

I think with some adjustments figured out here and there, this will all work out for you and you will be back on your bike.

PS...in the winter I continue my schedule but on the trainer to keep the momentum.

~ JoAnn

[LBTC]

Kimmy, you've had some good advice here, and I'll add my two cents, too.

Ask for help. It's something that those of us who do a good job are loathe to do (why is that? does it make us look weak or something?), but you are clearly given more than work than you have the capacity to do during reasonable hours.

Make a list of the tasks a junior employee (is there a spare board, a filing clerk, any temp employees?), could take on that would give you the time to get the important work done. Have a clear and concise plan of what your goal is and what is going to fall off the plate without more resources at your disposal.

The other idea I have is that if you are working until 5 anyway, do not go to work early. Go for your ride in the morning before you go to work, and arrive at work with your exercise done, full of energy and....at the same time as the rest of the workers.

Don't do what I did. I was doing longer hours (not as long as you, but apparently I don't have the tolerance for that), and didn't ask for help and my body basically told me to stop. I haven't actually missed any work, except for medical tests, since we started working towards the diagnosis of Crohn's that I received in November, but my work has suffered (my filing is about 3 months behind), and the rest of my life has suffered, too. You do not want to be here. Do not work this hard, your health is far too important!!

Good luck!

Hugs and butterflies,
~T~

[Mr. Bloom]

I feel compelled to discourage defining absolutes...for example: "I will never work past 5PM".

As I said earlier, I encourage and model balance. But I also model "rising to the challenge". In other words, I can't predict tomorrow, but I know that if something urgent arises, we all need to hunker down and get it done.

Today, I did an 18 hour day, but yesterday I left a few minutes early to capitalize on the great weather for a 20 mile ride. 19 miles into that ride, I stopped and talked to my boss/CEO while he and his wife walked their dogs as they were capitalizing on the good weather as well

But, if everyday is a crisis requiring everyone to always hunker down...THEN that's my job as boss to reconsider staffing and resources to reestablish balance.

[HappyAnika]

I feel compelled to discourage defining absolutes...for example: "I will never work past 5PM".

Hmm, I don't know if this was aimed at me or not, but I'll clarify anyway. I don't necessarily work in time absolutes. The only absolute for me is that work is not the most important thing in my life. This week I'm working 10 - 12 hour days in preparation for a conference next week, so I'm staying past 5, but that's my decision (or I leave at my usual 4:30 and then work from home). To balance that, I will likely take next Friday off because my work load will allow me to at that point. I just don't like it when other people expect me to stay past 5 even though I get in early every day. If I have advance notice, I can plan around it. Or if its really important I may be able to adjust my personal schedule. Most people I work with would think it unreasonable if I called a meeting at 7:30 am, I think its unreasonable to run meetings past 5 pm.

For me its all about priorities, I stop and ask myself, what's more important here? Work or non-work? Usually the answer is non-work.

"Nobody on their death bed ever said 'I wish I'd spent more time at the office.'"

[Mr. Bloom]

Hmm, I don't know if this was aimed at me or not,

It wasn't. I'm sorry if that upset you.

[RoadRaven]

"Nobody on their death bed ever said 'I wish I'd spent more time at the office.'"

Exactly.
This is something my partner said to me once when I was moaning and complaining about work, and what one of my colleagues does and expects of others (ie, she goes in at weekends and stays late a few nights a week)

I am prepared for the next time she says something to me that in ten years I won't regret (or even remember) the meeting/whatever I am missing, but I will regret and remember not saying goodnight to my sons because I get home too late to kiss them good night.