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Thread: Fred?

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  1. #1
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    Well, I guess "Fred" could include just about anything that obsessesive roadies don't do. But remember not all "roadies" are obsessive or snobby about what's cool and what isn't. Personally, I think that the very act of deciding what's uncool is in itself uncool. (and i suspect you agree, re:function over style).

    So with that in mind, and in the spirit of finding some amusement in it's silliness, fashion obsessed roadies might make fun of most anything, like:

    --wider tires than 23mm, or Kevlar tires to prevent flats, or any size tire other than 700's
    --regular (non-clipless) shoes and pedals
    --non-Lycra/Spandex bottoms
    --interruptor brakes
    --bells
    --mirrors
    --headlights or fixed lights of any kind (small Blinkies "might" be considered ok in the rain or twilight IF they are removed while not in use) (!)
    --ample saddlebags or panniers...nothing but the absolute smallest toolbag possible
    --any handlebars other than drop bars
    --"regular" food snacks like p&jsanwiches or Fig Newtons (not specifically manufactured for sport purposes)
    --cycling tops that are not polyesther with giant garish designs and brand logos on them
    --cushy padded "girly" saddles
    --"regular" everyday socks of any kind
    --plastic spoke protector discs
    --hairy legs or arms might go in this list (non-aerodynamic, must be shaved!)
    --wearing underwear under your shorts
    --not wearing special biking gloves
    --adequate maps (shows weakness and fear)
    --anything that adds any weight at all to your bike
    Last edited by BleeckerSt_Girl; 03-25-2007 at 05:47 PM.
    Lisa
    My mountain dulcimer network...FOTMD.com...and my mountain dulcimer blog
    My personal blog:My blog
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

  2. #2
    Join Date
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    Clarification

    I didn't mean to offend or be offensive.

    I just wanted to clarify something that some take way too seriously. Even when Mr. Silver heard me talking in jest, it clearly left an impact on him.
    "Being retired from Biking...isn't that kinda like being retired from recess?" Stephen Colbert asked of Lance Armstrong

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa S.H. View Post
    --wider tires than 23mm, or Kevlar tires to prevent flats, or any size tire other than 700's
    --regular (non-clipless) shoes and pedals
    --non-Lycra/Spandex bottoms
    --interruptor brakes
    --bells
    --mirrors
    --headlights or fixed lights of any kind (small Blinkies "might" be considered ok in the rain or twilight IF they are removed while not in use) (!)
    --ample saddlebags or panniers...nothing but the absolute smallest toolbag possible
    --any handlebars other than drop bars
    --"regular" food snacks like p&jsanwiches or Fig Newtons (not specifically manufactured for sport purposes)
    --cycling tops that are not polyesther with giant garish designs and brand logos on them
    --cushy padded "girly" saddles
    --"regular" everyday socks of any kind
    --plastic spoke protector discs
    --hairy legs or arms might go in this list (non-aerodynamic, must be shaved!)
    --wearing underwear under your shorts
    --not wearing special biking gloves
    --adequate maps (shows weakness and fear)
    --anything that adds any weight at all to your bike
    FWIW, I am guilty of more than half of the above listed "offenses".
    Lisa
    My mountain dulcimer network...FOTMD.com...and my mountain dulcimer blog
    My personal blog:My blog
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

  4. #4
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    San Francisco Bay Area
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    You weren't offensive Silver. Goodness, it would take way more than that to truly offend me.

    Labels are just silly, reminds me of junior high.

    V.
    Discipline is remembering what you want.


    TandemHearts.com

  5. #5
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    Apr 2006
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    Seattle
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    That's funny, I thought Fred was the guy with the super race bike,
    the team jersey/shorts/race helmet, all the bells and whistles that
    rides 10 miles on a flat road and doesn't know how to fix his own flat tires.
    Mimi Team TE BIANCHISTA
    for six tanks of gas you could have bought a bike.

  6. #6
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    Kelowna, BC, Canada
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    yeah me too. Kinda like the guy who buys all the expensive golf stuff or ski stuff and can't do either...
    It is never too late to be what you might have been. ~ George Elliot


    My podcast about being a rookie triathlete:Kelownagurl Tris Podcast

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Vancouver, BC
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    Humm, I'm also very much "function > form", but I must say:

    Arm and leg warmers go under the sleeves or shorts, not over.

    Jersey goes on top of the bib shorts' suspenders, not under.

    Beyond these two fashion rules , other riders can do whatever they want as long as they are safe.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Troutdale, OR
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    Fred (Wilma)

    I've never heard of turning up the elastic band. but maybe I'm just sheltered.

    I thought Fred was someone with really bad riding style and technique. Cloth and equipment wise I guess I was a Wilma for not switching over to clipless for a long time. I also refused to wear a cycling jersey and stuck with T-shirts for a long time. Now I wear the garish loud jersey. I still might get Southpark jersey with picture of Karmen on front and back. You can find it on TE's website.

    Oh the reason for guys to shave their leg is when they crash and have a rasberry, the hair doesn't get in the wound. If it scabs over with matted hair... not a pretty sight.

    Shawn

  9. #9
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    Dec 2006
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    Blessed to be all over the place!
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    Quote Originally Posted by mimitabby View Post
    That's funny, I thought Fred was the guy with the super race bike,
    the team jersey/shorts/race helmet, all the bells and whistles that
    rides 10 miles on a flat road and doesn't know how to fix his own flat tires.
    Well Mimi, I guess that would be ME

    Yesterday, Silver discovered that I had my inner tube, and this really nifty high tech universal tool, but absolutely NO LOW TECH TIRE LEVERS

    Call me FRED
    If you don't grow where you're planted, you'll never BLOOM - Will Rogers

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Silver View Post
    Well Mimi, I guess that would be ME

    Yesterday, Silver discovered that I had my inner tube, and this really nifty high tech universal tool, but absolutely NO LOW TECH TIRE LEVERS

    Call me FRED
    You should have just explained to her that you don't NEED tire levers- that you remove and replace your tire with your BARE HANDS while fixing a flat. (and then promptly go into the basement to practice actually DOING that so you won't be found out at a critical moment)
    Lisa
    My mountain dulcimer network...FOTMD.com...and my mountain dulcimer blog
    My personal blog:My blog
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

  11. #11
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    Mar 2007
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    Troutdale, OR
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    I thought it was always Fred and Wilma from the flintstones. not too bright was the idea or total obliviousness to their sourroundings/status.

    Barney I heard too, side kick of Fred. Happy go lucky. Again lack of awareness.

    well all I can say is if you are happy riding then that's good. enjoy. but if you are causing problems for others on the road well that's not so good.

    And who cares how one is dressed or what they ride. Exceptions are the posers with bad attitude.

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
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    1,011
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa S.H. View Post
    You should have just explained to her that you don't NEED tire levers- that you remove and replace your tire with your BARE HANDS while fixing a flat. (and then promptly go into the basement to practice actually DOING that so you won't be found out at a critical moment)
    Lisa, I think you know him well! But in this instance he wouldn't be able to do this....because I know that he doesn't have any idea HOW to change a tire

    It does give me a little bit of smugness. Very soon I will not be able to keep up with him. I struggle even now. He has a lot of up potential and I don't have much. So I'll hang on to this.
    "Being retired from Biking...isn't that kinda like being retired from recess?" Stephen Colbert asked of Lance Armstrong

  13. #13
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    the foggy wetlands,los osos,ca
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    Quote Originally Posted by mimitabby View Post
    That's funny, I thought Fred was the guy with the super race bike,
    the team jersey/shorts/race helmet, all the bells and whistles that
    rides 10 miles on a flat road and doesn't know how to fix his own flat tires.
    I concur with the added note. I thought everything had to be the same color i.e. colthes, helmet, shoes etc.. had to all be the same color. I thought that is what a Fred was?
    Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape.
    > Remember to appreciate all the different people in your life!

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Washington, DC
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    1,315
    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa S.H. View Post
    Well, I guess "Fred" could include just about anything that obsessesive roadies don't do. But remember not all "roadies" are obsessive or snobby about what's cool and what isn't. Personally, I think that the very act of deciding what's uncool is in itself uncool. (and i suspect you agree, re:function over style).

    So with that in mind, and in the spirit of finding some amusement in it's silliness, fashion obsessed roadies might make fun of most anything, like:

    --wider tires than 23mm, or Kevlar tires to prevent flats, or any size tire other than 700's
    --regular (non-clipless) shoes and pedals
    --non-Lycra/Spandex bottoms
    --interruptor brakes
    --bells
    --mirrors
    --headlights or fixed lights of any kind (small Blinkies "might" be considered ok in the rain or twilight IF they are removed while not in use) (!)
    --ample saddlebags or panniers...nothing but the absolute smallest toolbag possible
    --any handlebars other than drop bars
    --"regular" food snacks like p&jsanwiches or Fig Newtons (not specifically manufactured for sport purposes)
    --cycling tops that are not polyesther with giant garish designs and brand logos on them
    --cushy padded "girly" saddles
    --"regular" everyday socks of any kind
    --plastic spoke protector discs
    --hairy legs or arms might go in this list (non-aerodynamic, must be shaved!)
    --wearing underwear under your shorts
    --not wearing special biking gloves
    --adequate maps (shows weakness and fear)
    --anything that adds any weight at all to your bike
    You forgot Jersey underneath bibs.

    (i am also guilty of a few "fred" offenses)

    I saw something very interesting a few weeks back that may be the ultimate Fred: TT bike with Zipp 404s and all sorts of aero bling...bike's owner in aero helmet, booties, and skinsuit. ... *drumroll* .. Plus a triple.

    (this was not an uphill TT).

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by aicabsolut View Post
    You forgot Jersey underneath bibs.

    (i am also guilty of a few "fred" offenses)

    I saw something very interesting a few weeks back that may be the ultimate Fred: TT bike with Zipp 404s and all sorts of aero bling...bike's owner in aero helmet, booties, and skinsuit. ... *drumroll* .. Plus a triple.

    (this was not an uphill TT).
    OK, I am SO Fred that I don't even know why either of these things are "Fred"!!!
    Lisa
    My mountain dulcimer network...FOTMD.com...and my mountain dulcimer blog
    My personal blog:My blog
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

 

 

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