Thanks for words of wisdom. I feel better today. Yesterday was just one of those down-on-myself days that are oh so pleasant.

I went to yoga last night and thought a lot about this. I'm blessed to have a wonderful instructor who talks during class quite a bit about self-acceptance, courage, grace, etc. Last night in particular, she kept repeating that we are already "enough." With her guidance, I find that I'm much gentler with myself emotionally when I'm on my mat. Then I get on the bike--at least at group rides--and it's a different story. The bottom line is that I need to devote some energy toward bringing my attitude at yoga to the bike. After all, no one, other than me, is telling me that I'm not good enough. I am, by nature, both competitive and driven. Those traits, as many of you know, can work both for and against you.....

As for the Club: CIBA is big and while it does a lot of things really well, it is rather impersonal as an organization. There are lots of quality people in the group, but it's up to you to find them. There's a debate currently raging on our website about how to attract new/young people to the organization. When I read posts here about how other clubs do their rides, I often wonder whether it's time that CIBA did a wholesale analysis of how it organizaes and runs its rides. Like I said, the riders leave en masse. The rides, especially at the height of the season, attract upwards of 150-200 riders. The ride leaders do not do the ride but, instead, sign everyone in, man the SAGs, patrol the route, etc. If anyone congregates after the ride, it's because they want to, not because CIBA encourages or fosters it.

While I have not signed on to be a ride leader this year, I have offered to help a friend who is serving as a rider leader several times and who manages one of our local bike shops. I'm a very social person, so I have no trouble meeting and befriending people so hopefully over the season I'll get to know more and more of the regulars. I'm also getting to know some riders who are in a bit of a splinter group. They participate in CIBA but also ride as a group on their own too.

I'm likely riding by myself tonight. I think that will be time well spent.


Kate