What to do about crazy cyclist-driver confrontations?

[missymaya]

So, I went riding with my women's weekend group this past weekend. How could I not with the weather being as beautiful as it is recently. Anyway, there was 7 of us, inlcuding one guy, which is typical for our group. We ride in a rotating paceline, so there's usually one line of cyclists on the road and 2 across when the lead changes. Well, the guy in our group was coming off the lead when a man in a van drove up next to our guy. They started mixing words, cussing and insulting and all of that stuff, while we ladies were just trying to ride away and avoid getting into a fight with a person driving a VAN!!
The van guy sped past us and stopped at the intersection up ahead, which we unfortunately had to cross and was at a red. The guy actually hopped out of the van and was ready for a throw down Our guy rode up. Well, lets just say the guy in the van was not exactly big and our guy was well, big enough to intimidate and van guy hopped back in his vehicle and drove away.
Now this is the part that gets me. It seemed that out of the 7 of us, I was the only one to be concerned with whether or not this guy could have had a gun or run us over or something absolutely terrible. The other ladies thought that well the van guy was an idiot and doesnt know that cyclists are allowed 2 across but that our guy shouldnt have instigated the confrontation either. Not much concern for safety or violence that could have occured. Recently, someone got shot and died from road rage (the night of the Daytona 500) not too far from where we were at.
Am I being paranoid? Did the rest of the group act or react accordingly (not including our guy's actions)? Any thoughts. I dont know what to think of it since I've never in a situation such as that. People have yelled at me and stuff but I never react in such a manner as to instigate.

[xeney]

I'm not really understanding what your group did to instigate the conflict. It sounds like the guy in your group didn't back down, but I don't understand what you think the women should have done differently. Just worried more? Panicked? Fled? I'm not really sure how any of those choices would have helped the situation.

I think it's a really bad idea to go around starting fights, but I also think it's not smart to live your life in fear of the worst possible outcome. Road rage is a real thing but it's still a fairly remote possibility, usually, that somebody is actually going to shoot you.

[missymaya]

Let me clarify: the group as a whole did not instigate, only the guy in our group did. The reaction that got me was not the response to the incident, such as fleeing or whatever. The reaction Im considering is that the group was more like "the driver was in the wrong", which he was, but not considering the other side, our guy also insulted and cussed out the driver, instigating as well.

[DeniseGoldberg]

I've only had one experience like that in all of my years of cycling. I was happily riding down the road when someone drove by, rolled down their window, and threw some trash at me. Unfortunately I was too busy making sure I didn't crash to catch their license number, so I wasn't able to do what I wanted to. I really wanted to report the driver to the police, but without a license number as identification I figured it wouldn't do any good.

You clearly were not in the wrong here. And I would also attempt to avoid confrontation - it sounds like the guy in your group may have caused the situation to escalate. But reporting the driver to the police might help.

--- Denise

[Grog]

I'm sorry about that incident...

One thing that helps in coordinating a paceline while riding on a street with a not-so-broad shoulder and some traffic is to keep the lead changes to a minimum until there is less traffic/a broader shoulder but, if that is not feasible, to have the person who's dropping back do so from the right-hand side, i.e. on the outside of the road. Hence what the drivers coming from behind see is always ONE line of cyclist, and the lone cyclist dropping back is "protected" by the paceline.

I could imagine it would be harder for a car (and somewhat unexpected) to see a single cyclist against the background of the paceline...

I also agree that we should be polite, firm, but non-confrontational. I'm not too concerned with people carrying guns but then if I was in Florida I probably would be.

Good luck on your next ride...

[mimitabby]

Sometimes just seeing the bikes makes some people see red.
I don't think there was anything you could have done to make it better
or different except for get the guy's license plate #.
Also, tell your friend the bicyclist to cool it next time.
(but who knows what the van driver said or did that set him off?!)

[BleeckerSt_Girl]

Maybe when changing lead and going doubled up, cyclists could first check to wait for a traffic gap so the doubling can be done when no cars are going to be passing? Just a thought.

[Kitsune06]

Another good reason to have one of those handlebar holsters for mace. Mace that works on dogs will work on people. We're fortunate, as women, that men don't get their hanes in a knot and decide to pick fights. But we're unfortunate, as women, in that if they don't want to pick fights....

mace, ladies.
and always be careful out there.

[Geonz]

When stuff like that happens, a group tends to form One Opinion as an initial response, and heaven help anybody not on their side. I'm with you - diplomacy could have gone a *long* way. It may not be "wrong" if "the other guy started it" - but that doesn't make it smart. OTOH, guys have that radar that *usually* tells 'em when they should be diplomatic... on the third hand, who knows how that driver is feeling right now. If he came upon a lone cyclist in five more miles...

[downhilldiva]

My boyfriend had an encounter the other day. After being yelled at as the driver passed him they were both stopped at a stop light. My boyfriend got spit on, he retaliated by leaning towards the car to yell at the driver. The driver grabbed him by his shirt and his leather cord necklace. The BF retaliated by trying to punch the driver through the window and kicking off his rearview mirror. The fight continued to escalate into wrestling on the ground. Finally bystanders threatened to call the police and the driver got in his car and left.
I am not saying that he handled this appropriately or not. (He used to be a bike messenger in a big city so he seems used to this type of confrontation.) I don't know how I would have handled it. I probably would have just rode away as quick as possible and then cried most of the day. I'm thinking the mace might be good.

[equus123]

i tend to just ignore somebody if they say things or become enraged (for no reason what so ever). i either ignore them or smile and wave. 9 times out of 10 they shut up and just keep driving.

it really is amazing the amount of road rage drivers there are out there the second they near cyclists. it makes no sense to me. my teammates and i get it all the time - the screaming, the honking, the zooming past, the arms flailing out of the window. what's the big deal people? JUST GO AROUND. that's all you have to do. almost seems like a new problem to be treated anymore - road rage.