unreasonable goals

[Veronica]

I'm with you. He doesn't even own a bike yet? Yeah, that's crazy. What if he hates riding?

V.

[Bad JuJu]

Right. And the fact that he couldn't finish the spinning class suggests not only that he's not in shape for a long ride, but also that he has no idea how to pace himself. Sounds like a recipe for...maybe not disaster, but certainly for failure.

[Kimmyt]

OTOH, maybe he will find out he really loves cycling and found the encouragement in this AIDS ride (which I'm assuming is a supported ride) to do something he never thought he could do.

You've told him what you thought, and he didn't listen. Is he your friend?

Sometimes we just have to sit by and let our friends do what they want and offer support if they fail. Not 'I told you so's. They are adults after all.

Yes, 575 miles in 7 days is a lot, especially for someone who just bought a bike and has never cycled before. It sounds near impossible to me, and I have a feeling he'll realize this on about Day 1 of the ride, but he'll be realizing this FOR HIMSELF and not with someone telling him what he can't do (everytime someone tells me what I can't do, I know that I am that much more determined to do it). But also keep in mind that there are people out there that just decide to do something, and surprisingly enough, do it.

Why don't you use your experience to try and help your friend prepare for this, go on some training rides with him, instead of simply naysaying him.

[Batbike]

I believe that encouraging your friend will do more than "naysaying". Maybe, just maybe, they will finish the ride and it will change their life because they accomplished a goal; maybe they will ride only half way and it will change their life because they worked toward a goal; and maybe they will plan for the ride and it will change their life because they now have new goals and dreams yet to accomplish. To me, cycling is more than about riding the bike, it is life-altering, and as cyclists, we need to support each other by help and encouragement.

A personal story: Way back when, over 20 years ago, I was in college and owned a tour bike. I never really rode it, except sporadically. In fact, during my last year of school it was stored in my parent's house 100's of miles away! Right before graduation a friend of mine, who grew-up in New Orleans, asked me if I would ride my bike with him, from Georgia, to visit his mom in New Orleans --he had no other way to get home but with his bike and did not want to ride alone. I said "yes". So, after graduation I picked-up my dusty bike and rode it, full gear and no training, to New Orleans. It took a week and we rode through 5 states to get there. NOT saying is a wise idea, but I did it -- mind over matter, or just the stupidity of youth, but I did it. I will never forget the experience. It changed my life -- not immediately, but long-term, and in so many many ways!!! So, you JUST NEVER KNOW ... a bike can do wonderful things to people, especially when they least expect it!

[KnottedYet]

And there is always the option of volunteering to crew the ALC. There are tons of volunteer positions, crew can fundraise, and crew gets to participate just as much as the riders do. (they just don't ride, but the crew is equally important. ALC wouldn't happen without crew!)

If he finds that physically he just can't do the ride by June, would he be willing to contact a volunteer co-ordinator?

[Veronica]

So I'm doing a lot of inferring here. But here's what I see.

Guy tries a spin class, can't make it through it. Has he been back in the month since he tried it? How dedicated to completing the AIDS ride is he, if he hasn't been back to the spin class that will help get him in shape to do the AIDS ride?

I'm all for cheering on people who are trying something new and are pushing themselves to excel. But as I'm always telling my friends and family. You don't wake up one morning and go out and ride 200 miles. Long distance riding takes training. Frankly I'm hearing wishful thinking, pie in the sky...hmmmm... PIE!

V.

[Kimmyt]

I'm not saying tell him that he can do it if you don't think he can. I'm saying support his decision to do it, because he is your friend. SHe's already told him (and his mom, and everyone on the internet) what she thinks of his goal. He is obviously going to do this ride, with or without her support.

Being a friend sometimes means supporting someone in decisions that you don't necessarily agree with.

K.

[Trek420]

This year is my 3rd time riding, 5th time participating (crewed one year, led or I should say swept training rides another). Yes, it is an impossible goal and I've done it twice.

I gotta go to work right now so I'll just vote:

Encourage him but this should be a long term goal.

Can he train, fundraise if he wants to but crew this year and ride next?

His goal should be to do at least one or more centuries this year, maybe even one of the other AIDS rides, MS 150 etc. Come crew with us, it's much harder than riding anyway and do the long ride NEXT year.