Tho it sounds like you are being strong. I just want to remind you that you can never give up!! I had to go through a regimen of anti cancer drugs a few years ago and I was told that the side effects were just like chemo. I vividly remember how ill I was, and how depressed I got. But I want you to know that there are people all over this country- the world actually (we are one BIG family here at TE) - that are pulling for you. There will be many prayers from many faiths spoken for you.
Please consider this a big ((((((((((HUG))))))))))))) from not so sunny Arizona.
My prayers are that you stay strong and get through this.
Go get em Ruth!
Denise