Grog, on the other side of things: don't let anyone make you feel bad for doing the catering thing. I got some grief about how if we were trying to keep it simple, why were we having the party at a restaurant and serving a meal, why didn't we just have people over to our house? Well, because I have a job and only one bathroom! Our venue provided a wedding planner, which sounds crazy and over the top, but she was actually a sweet 80-year-old volunteer who helped me pick the menu, stage managed everything behind the scenes, told us where to put the speakers, and basically took all the stress and pressure off of us. Having it catered meant I just pointed at a menu and said, "I want that." Having it at a restaurant meant I didn't have to clean up. Having it at a restaurant meant I didn't have to decorate or rent chairs and tablecloths and all that stuff.

It wasn't a $500 event -- I think the final tally was closer to $5,000 -- but it was the best balance we found between low-key, and not making ourselves crazy. Sometimes it can be even MORE work to keep everything deliberately low-key. (Like invitations. All my friends are crafty and spent weeks and weeks making their own "simple" invitations. I didn't even want to deal with fighting a laser printer, so for me it was worth it to order them from a printer.)