Child Placement - any attorneys here?

[mimitabby]

The sad part of this is that in these situations, the person who usually wins is the lawyer. And you need one. I hope you find a big protective boyfriend soon too. This is really scary stuff. Hey, maybe a big protective LAWYER boyfriend?

[ridethewind]

The sad part of this is that in these situations, the person who usually wins is the lawyer.

Actually, that's not true. There's no money to be made in handling cases like this. In many situations, the lawyers are lucky to get paid in full. Usually, neither party has a lot of money. I handled many such cases and frequently did not break even, particularly when I represented the woman. Sometimes, I took a case knowing that I would likely not get paid for the time I put into it because the woman needed help and she could not afford to pay what a lawyer would normally charge. There ARE lawyers out there who care and who are not just in it for the money.

[KnottedYet]

"the children always suffer"

Dar - my biological parents divorced when I was very young. In my case, the distance between them was not enough. It was an ugly ugly criminal situation. And the kids suffered. In a bad way.

If you have any concern that your son's care while at his dad's is less than adequate, please do all you can to protect him. If you are fearing for your safety from this man, does his behaviour reflect on your kid's safety also?

[mtbdarby]

Actually, that's not true. There's no money to be made in handling cases like this. In many situations, the lawyers are lucky to get paid in full. Usually, neither party has a lot of money. I handled many such cases and frequently did not break even, particularly when I represented the woman. Sometimes, I took a case knowing that I would likely not get paid for the time I put into it because the woman needed help and she could not afford to pay what a lawyer would normally charge. There ARE lawyers out there who care and who are not just in it for the money.

RTW - oh, they got paid in full. It was their priority to make sure of that. I was neither impressed with the attornies nor family court and the guardium ad lietum about them putting my sons best intersest at stake. Family court and the GAL couldn't even be bothered to make sure my ex followed court orders - even when presented with evidence the he didn't and his own admission - in their prescense - that he wouldn't follow them. I know all attorneys aren't bad and the system is over worked, yadda, yadda, just don't get me started with the ones I had to deal with, 'K?

Irulan, I am an al-anon member. I never said he was evil either. He can be a very good dad when he wants to be, our son just hasn't been his priority. His #1 beef with the entire experience is that he has to pay child support. I called his bluff. I told him he could have him for a month this summer on a trial basis, but that I checked and they most likely wouldn't change his child support payments. Haven't heard from him since and he wouldn't talk to me when we exchanged ds this weekend.

Knot, thanks Hon. That's why I live up here I have no choice but to trust he will remain sober when he has our son - it's out of my control. I am a documenting fool and if he screws up he pays the consequence. My son's safety is my first priority.

I'll keep you guys posted on this. Thanks for sharing your experiences and advise everyone!