Small problems but at my wits end

[light_sabe_r]

Theav! Just throw your pup's poo into his veggie patch. ^_^ Or better yet in this drought stricken climate we're experiencing... THROW IT ON HIS ROOF SO IT'LL BE WASHED INTO HIS RAINWATER TANK! REVENGE IS SWEET!

He'll have no idea why his drinking water tastes so bad...

Actually a mate of mine had a rat die in their tank... She kept wondering what that weird taste in the water was... When her dad found it the whole family dry wretched and ordered a lot of spring valley water.

Anyway Tell him to move go back to the dark ages. It's 2006 and women have been granted equal rights for almost 110 years in this country!!

NOW on with the tree. You could always do what NOOSA CITY COUNCIL does and what the Redlands Shire and Brisbane city are looking to adopt.

A shame game.

Erect a sign out the front of your house that says something like

"These trees have been poisoned by a heartless man looking to improove his view" Noosa also places the fine for damaging private/council property and a crimestoppers number on there.




As for the other girl at work. What is it with researchers and our odd personalities eh?

I work with a girl who comes from a farm. did her degree in Equine studies, I'm a country girl too so I thought we'd get on.

We don't. Our personalities REALLY clash! Since she has gotten here she has made my life miserable. i try to be nice and give all the time I can give but it started eating into my own work time.

Now she keeps complaining her persnal space is being invaded. She claims everyone yells at her (including our supervisor who can't yell to save her life but will yell to cheer on the Broncos!) AND as an extra annoyance she puts on a "I'm so sweet and innocent" voice on when she's on the phone! YARGH!!!! ;_;

Plus she keeps harping on about how her contract ends in january. SO We're in Science. EVERYONE is on one year contracts!!


Yup I feel your pain. No ideas other than keep talking to your supervisor and ignore her unprofessional behaviour.

[Velobambina]

Be patient. Karma is the great leveler and while it might not be apparent or happen quickly, what goes around will come around for the mean folks. In the meantime, maintain your dignity, don't give them any reason to be mean to you (be polite to them, in other words), and try not to waste your energy on them.

[doc]

I recently had a bunch of mean people dump on me too. One example:
I am a volunteer soccer coach on a little local league for 8 & 9 yo girls. One mother accused me of purposely not notifying her that our soccer team had a game so that her daughter, who isn't the best, would not be there and we'd win. In fact I did email her, but in one of those email glitches, she didn't get it.

Meanwhile I am volunteering my free time for this. Plus, I rotate every kid in an equal amount of time, and in whatever position they want to try, because this is supposed to be fun.

I know that sounds small, but when you think about it, she is accusing me of being so cruel and selfish and mean that I would exclude a little kid from her own team just to win a game. I was super hurt by the accusation. So I told her so. She proceeded to yell at me some more, demanding apologies, and as for me? Her exact words were, "Get over it". I literally cried that night.

So my point is, we have no control over the people around us. We can hold our heads up high knowing we did the right thing. And then we have to do something nice for ourselves because we deserve it. I feel your pain and frustration!

[DDH]

Goodness, I don't know what is wrong with people these days, but you see this kind of stuff all the time.
It's become such an "all about me" world. No one wants to take responsibility for their actions, and blame everyone else. People treat other people with loath and disrespect.
I find myself getting very cynical and that really isn't like me and it really bothers me that I have gotten this way. It's hard not to though.

I guess we just have to learn to not let these kinds of people get to us and know inside that we are good and do our best. These others are just miserable and because of such, want to make everyone else around them the same way.

Try not to let them get to you. I know it's hard, but just count to 10 and think to yourself how happy it makes you that you are not such a miserable person as they are. Then look them square in the face and tell them with all the sympathy you can muster, how sorry you are they have such miserable lives that they feel they must make everyone else the same way.
Do it with a smile and sincerity and then turn and walk away.
They won't know what hit them, and this keeps you from lowering yourself to their level.
Now I need to learn to take my own good advice.

[7rider]

It is their dinosaur brain taking over, according to Berstein and Rozen:
http://www.wiley.com/WileyCDA/WileyT...47161808X.html

Sad that folks often have so little regard for others. I thought it was a problem in the US. Sadly, it seems to be universal.

[doc]

Here is a little video to cheer you up (monty python)

http://dingo.care-mail.com/cards/flash/5409/galaxy.swf

[Quillfred]

Theav

Your neighbbor sounds like a dangerous man to me. There are too many angry people who can't control their tempers. The newspapers are filled with the results of their rage.

I think it is sensibile to fear this man. Not to give him more power but because that you know he is already capable of violence. I don't know if it is feasible for you, but I would move if I could.

I just had an irresponsible neighbor cut trees on our mutual bank. Although technically on his side of the line, the slope is a slide area and the trees were integral to the stability of the hill and our house as well.

I had one contact with him. Luckily for us, the city here has strict regulations on this thing and I was able to make him stop and get proper permits and hopefully he will restabilize the hill. I don't think he will retaliate.

In the meantime, you are right to resist retaliation because he will probably come back at you, miserable ba$tard that he is. Sorry you are having a hard time.

Quillfred

[eclectic]

No ideas on the gal from work other than best wishes

Re the neighbor. Why does he want the tree cut down? He has every right to cut down any part that is over his property. Let him get a court order if he wants the entire tree down.

If he came on my property I would file a trespassing charge against him and you do have the right to file a disorderly conduct charge re the threats. Even if it doesn't stick it is up to him to prove innocence more than you need to prove guilt. (I know this first hand because of my stupid and I mean dumber than a box of rocks, neighbors )

the saying goes "tall fences make for good neighbors" Are you able to build a a very tall fence on his side

Re poisoning the pup - I can see where that is a very legitimate fear. We had a dog poisoned when my kids were young - very traumatic, I don't know how this could be prevented if someone was bent on revenge and psychopathic enough to act on it.

Good luck and let us know how everything turns out

[wannaduacentury]

I agree that karma can have its own negative effect. As for work issues, I(we-the whole store) had this PIA asst store mgr and he was so full of himself arrgh, he even had an affair w/ a girl in my dept and they both denied it, but he went on a business trip to help stores after Hurr. Katrina and bragged about his affair(go figure) he also had several sexual harrassment cases against him, at the present job and those before in which he was fired and he got fired from this one too. No one could figure out why his nice wife w/ 2 beautiful kids wouldn't leave the jerk. Well I heard he's working for his brother at some restaurant and I can only wonder, which waitress he's baiting now. When he was fired, he was in the middle of a transfer and no one was sad to see him go.
I had another job where the mgr was another horses patoot and he was mean to me as well- he got sacked too and I still had my job. Just goes to prove. Hang in there. jennifer

[BleeckerSt_Girl]

....These others are just miserable and because of such, want to make everyone else around them the same way.
... I know it's hard, but just count to 10 and think to yourself how happy it makes you that you are not such a miserable person as they are.

Similarly, I try to think just one thought- how happy I am that I am not them. That I don't have to live inside their mean selfish brains 24 hours a day and live their miserable little lives BEING them. When I think about that enough, it helps me to distance myself from them. They WANT you to be upset with them! Don't give them what they want. Feel sorry for them instead. Don't confront them in anger or with sarcasm. Best not to confront them at all. Play it straight, polite, and calm and you'll never regret your actions later.
I know, easier said than done. But I do try to turn my mind around that way if I can, simply because i know it will make ME feel better.