Thread Drift

[Lise]

Good grief! I go cheer at the marathon and then make out for hours with J. and you people go berserk!

I will answer the first question: How do I stand it when women make poor choices around childbearing? I stay as "in the moment" as I possibly can. I try to help women feel proud of the bodies, their babies, and make the best choices they can. And I have the luxury of transferring someone out of the midwifery service (to the docs) if she's acting in a way that's dangerous for herself or her baby.

As an infertile midwife, I made my peace some years ago with the fact that there's no "justice" in who conceives, only biology. Sometimes pregnancy and birth can be a positive life-transforming experience for a woman/family, and I try to help that happen. The rest I do my best to accept. I do have moments when I walk out of a patient's room and put my head in my hands. I know that many women were abused as children and feel ambivalent/detached/hateful about their own bodies. I try to help them be as connected to their babies as I can. But I realize that I'm just a blip on the radar screen of their lives.

People get pregnant. Life goes on. I work hard to help women find safe, effective contraception so they can *choose* when they want to have babies, if at all.

MP, looking forward to the marathon report! L.