Originally posted by spazzdog
From Nov 2002 until May 2003 I got more and more depressed. I have been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Disorder... it is doubtful that I will ever be able to return to work in my field or any other. I can't be around people (in person) anymore. This website, up to now, is my 'social' life.

I'm thankful for the group here... I don't feel so cut off.
You have shown that you are a lot stronger than you think you are! When you're at a low point in your life, it is difficult to see how much you have accomplished, but from your description here, you're tougher than you let on. After the broken relationship, the only thing that kept you going was work. But when that crashed, you still didn't give in!

You say you can't be around people anymore, but you've accomplished a big step in going on a group ride. And you say that this website is your "social" life, but you've only been a member for a week! You survived a long time without TE! Survival isn't the same as thriving, but it's a lot better than defeat!

Sometimes you have to consider maintaining your position as a victory! A line from a Bruce Springsteen song: "Like soldiers in the winter's night with a vow to defend
No retreat, baby, no surrender!"

Dig down deep. Your bag of tricks is deeper than you realize!