Triskelion, thanks again for your long and thoughtful response. I think what bothers me most is not the squirrellyness, but the pain. Pain on a short ride
translates into SERIOUS pain on a longer one. I will take it all with a grain of salt and ride the bike for 200 miles before i make a decision because a dozen wise women on this forum suggest that this is best.

The thing about the 2 different sized wheels is this:
Human beings of all ages, from tiny tots to giant men can ride bikes with 2 wheels both the same size. What is so different about petite women that we can't? Why must petite women (argueably the most perfectly proportioned humans ) be singled out as the only humans that MUST have a bike with 2 different sized wheels?
I find the name of the Terry Symmetry rather ironic myself.

As for toes touching the front wheel, I have probably had that with every bike i've ever owned and it's not a big problem to me. It's something you get used to. That goes right along with getting grease on my thighs and remembering not to brake too hard with the front wheel.

The biggest thing for me that i am going from a fairly comfortable hybrid with straight handlebars and crummy gearing to this great Bianchi which sings up hills and can charge across the flats but has these silly handlebars that really seem to be situated in the wrong place.

I really appreciate all the time that folks have given to this dilemma and I hope that I can return the favor often!